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Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people 45+. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

The story of Abraham and Sarah is told in chapters 11-25 of the book of Genesis.
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Apr 29 new
(Quote) Dan-28682 said: This makes me think of my parish. The people crow about how beautiful the church building is and how grea...
(Quote) Dan-28682 said:



This makes me think of my parish. The people crow about how beautiful the church building is and how great the music is and how welcoming the people are. While all of this is true, at least to an extent, it is very rare to see anyone doing something like praying before Mass because everyone is too busy socializing. While the music is entertaining, it is often exactly that, entertaining, and it distracts from the Mass. During the announcements at the end of Mass, people are often introduced and applauded as though you are at a show. And a fairly high percentage of people leave before the priest and before the final hymn is complete. Of course, even if you wait till the final hymn is complete, the band waits a few seconds and then starts playing music again so that they are playing music as you leave the church. Today, my friend and I stopped to pray before we left after morning Mass. I noticed that we were the only ones...in a church that holds nearly 2000 people.

This is not the Mass as I know it. Not only do people not participate, but there is a lack of reverence and understanding as to what is going on. It's kind of sad, but I'm not sure what to do about it.

--hide--


I don't remember which saint but one wrote that the 20 minutes after receiving Holy Communion are the most precious moments of our life. We should be focused only on Our Lord. Twenty minutes is about the time it takes for the Sacred Host to be assimilated into our system. We are as a paten, carrying Him during that time.
Apr 29 new

(Quote) Meg-920823 said: I don't remember which saint but one wrote that the 20 minutes after receiving Holy Communion ...
(Quote) Meg-920823 said:

I don't remember which saint but one wrote that the 20 minutes after receiving Holy Communion are the most precious moments of our life. We should be focused only on Our Lord. Twenty minutes is about the time it takes for the Sacred Host to be assimilated into our system. We are as a paten, carrying Him during that time.
--hide--


I attended a mission once at a church where there was a problem with people leaving right after receiving Holy Communion. The mission priest told them that he would send the altar boys with lighted candles to escort those who left Mass early to their cars since they were carrying Jesus with them. NO ONE left early :)

Apr 29 new
(Quote) Therese-632256 said: I attended a mission once at a church where there was a problem with people leaving right...
(Quote) Therese-632256 said:




I attended a mission once at a church where there was a problem with people leaving right after receiving Holy Communion. The mission priest told them that he would send the altar boys with lighted candles to escort those who left Mass early to their cars since they were carrying Jesus with them. NO ONE left early :)

--hide--


That is GREAT! I love that.

Our pastor, when I was a child, likened it to going to someone's house for dinner, eating the meal and running off without after dinner conversation or even a thank you or farewell.

I think of Jesus, looking sad, asking us why we won't stay with Him awhile and visit after He has just given us Himself.
Apr 30 new

(Quote) Fred-828727 said: (Quote) Paul-302787 said: In many churches it is impossible to pray before...
(Quote) Fred-828727 said:

Quote:
Paul-302787 said:

In many churches it is impossible to pray before the Mass because there is too much banter. Unfortunately, your parish is not the only one of the kind.

Our church we do the rosary before Sunday Mass and it gives a right mind set before Mass

--hide--


My parish also says the Rosary before at least one mass. We are a big congregation and mostly fill the (large) church at two masses on Saturday and five on Sunday Morning. The Rosary is prayed Sunday Mornings before the 11:30 Mass for sure (I lead it sometimes), but I don't know about the other masses. I actually go to our 10:00 mass, then stick around to pray the Rosary before the 11:30.


I can see how some might percieve us as "offish" just because we are so big! It is really easy with that many people to disappear in the crowd.

Apr 30 new

My parish priest told us he likes to see people visiting/chatting after Mass. He feels it is a sign of community. I also see a small number of people staying to pray even while there is visiting going on.

My church's open design doesn't lend itself to silence very well. The sound from the lobby carries up over the choirloft into the sanctuary. I suppose if one wants to pray in silence one can wait until all the people leave. It usually doesn't take too long for the people to leave anyway.

Apr 30 new

Lois perhaps the following are not relevant to your discussion but came to mine when reading your thread.

For the last 10 years or so I have taken myself to Lenten fish frys (as a penance as I really do not really enjoy fried fish dinners all that well boggled ) choosing a different parish each week. If working in a different town I will go to one in that town.

I really enjoy doing this and it has helped me be more "open" to others. Determining where to sit is always a dilemma that must be solved. I often sit with someone elderly who is sitting alone. These people are almost always widowers. They are almost always grateful for the company. Sometimes I will single out families. I really enjoy doing this and have shared some nice meals with others. Mostly people are open if you try to open the door. It is almost never opened to you by parish members. I remember playing with a young couples kids and many nice polite conversations over the years. Some people want their privacy and I try to "read" that and respect their wishes.

This Lenten season two things happened two me that I thought was interesting. At one popular parish there were at least six priests in attendance (a few were retired) None welcomed people. One came and sat diagonally across the table from me and began dialoguing with parishioners at the table and did not acknowledge my presence with a hello. Basically like most every parishioner from previous experience over the years. It seems to be the Catholic way. Now I still enjoyed myself but you have to make it happen.

A week or two later I consulted the diocesan on line directory looking for a different parish offering the meals. I found St. Geoge's which I tried. Being directed to the parish I entered what I believed was a Eastern Rite Catholic parish hall. I was mistaken, it was an Orthodox parish. Oh my what a difference. Because of circumstances I was forced to sit at a round table alone. But for the first time in 10 years someone got up from their table and came over to sit and chat a bit. At least 6 people thanked me for stopping by to share a dinner. It was so different from my experience of all the many parishes I have attended.

My conclusionn. There is none as my experience after even 10 years of enjoyoying these meals and meeting some pretty nice people is way too small to be meaniful. I will say that if you want to enjoy yourself it is up to you. Catholics within my experience and region are not open unless you approach them. Are these words relevant to your dicussion?

May 01 new

(Quote) Paul-866591 said: The Mass actually ends when the Priest pronounces the words of dismissal and the people r...
(Quote) Paul-866591 said:

The Mass actually ends when the Priest pronounces the words of dismissal and the people respond.

Common courtesy demands and dictates that people should wait until the Priest has left (processed out) the main part of the church.

--hide--
That is true. "The Mass has ended. Go in peace to love and serve the Lord." The end.

As you say though, it is only common courtesy to stay until the priest has processed (along with his entourage).

May 01 new

(Quote) Lois-880877 said: Today I went to the local Catholic Church. It was a beautifu l modern church. Everything looked pe...
(Quote) Lois-880877 said:

Today I went to the local Catholic Church. It was a beautifu l modern church. Everything looked perfect. So why did I not feel right here? No one welcomed me to the church. I smiled and tried to strike up conversations but no takers. The service seemed like it had been rehersed down to the letter. The Priest played a very small part in the entire ceremony. He didn't even look happy to be there.


Luckily there is another Catholic Church within driving distance I am planning on trying next week. It may be a little farther away but I hope it is a much better fit.


Has anyone else ever felt like this when trying out a church?

--hide--
Yes, and I'm sure many others (probably most) have experienced the same.

The main purpose of going to Mass is to participate in it, and, if able, to receive the Eucharist. By participating, I'm including listening to the prayers and readings, the homily, and being vocal in the responses and singing of hymns. To this end, it makes no difference if the people around you seem aloof, or the priest isn't enthusiastic.

But....in selecting a parish to call "home", there is something more inviting when the people are warm and friendly, and open to greeting one another -- someone known or a visitor. The warmth can be felt. The priest can be "inviting" by showing pleasure to be presiding at the Mass. Someone (usually ushers) to say "Hello" on the way in, and some form of farewell upon leaving adds to it.

While we don't go to Mass to be entertained or become engaged socially, some displays of welcoming certainly are a plus and can add to one's enthusiasm about attending Mass there.

But let's put the shoe on the other foot. Is there a reason why we ourselves can't initiate signs of friendship, taking steps to promote this feeling? What if we would greet an usher first? What if we extended our hands toward those around us during the sign of peace? What if we actually said "Hello" to those nearby before the Mass begins? We rely upon others to do what we want, but aren't always inclined to start the ball rolling. Complaining is a negative reaction. Isn't there a more positive way for us to follow ourselves?

Careful with that -- it could be contagious.

May 01 new

With my church slated to close in December, this is one of my greatest fears ... that I won't be able to find a church where I feel comfortable .... It has me wondering if i will even continue to go to Mass after my church is gone .. I never thought I would ever think this way, but it is happening ...

May 01 new
Richard, God will provide. Put it in His hands. I know you love your Faith and God will give you a Mass to attend. JMJ

theheart Praying
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