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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

May 20 new
Angela, The Invitation is one of my favourites, too.

The Invitation by Oriah

It doesnt interest me
what you do for a living.
I want to know
what you ache for
and if you dare to dream
of meeting your hearts longing.
It doesnt interest me
how old you are.
I want to know
if you will risk
looking like a fool
for love
for your dream
for the adventure of being alive.
It doesnt interest me
what planets are
squaring your moon...
I want to know
if you have touched
the centre of your own sorrow
if you have been opened
by lifes betrayals
or have become shrivelled and closed
from fear of further pain.
I want to know
if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it
or fix it.
I want to know
if you can be with joy
mine or your own
if you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you
to the tips of your fingers and toes
without cautioning us
to be careful
to be realistic
to remember the limitations
of being human.
It doesnt interest me
if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself.
If you can bear
the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see Beauty
even when it is not pretty
every day.
And if you can source your own life
from its presence.
I want to know
if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand at the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,
Yes.
It doesnt interest me
to know where you live
or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up
after the night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.
It doesnt interest me
who you know
or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand
in the centre of the fire
with me
and not shrink back.
It doesnt interest me
where or what or with whom
you have studied.
I want to know
what sustains you
from the inside
when all else falls away.
I want to know
if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like
the company you keep
in the empty moments.

By Oriah Mountain Dreaming,

May 20 new
Rosemarie, your reply is right up my street ! Love the sharp focus on spirituality and being Christ-centered. theheart
May 20 new
This is an interesting question Paul.

At my age, I was looking for that man who has 4Ps qualities, and I would say all the women here have already posted those characteristics in their own different language.

Yes, we are looking for a man who can 1. Pastor the home, us.. as we looking up for them too for our spiritual being. 2. Protector, (that we seeing them as our hero, protecting our own purity and leading us more to Him) 3. Provider (of course, He knows what it takes to have that good and great family ahead) and 4. Pro-life (yes, the defender of life itself)

In my rosary prayer, I always offered the last mystery for that future spouse of mine who has that characteristics above. Yes, I learned to be specific cause I already witnessed how great and marvelous God answered prayer through time and consistent prayer.

oh! Let me add: that women love to have this 'has only eyes and heart for her'.

And I agree that he has a life of his own too, that he is already a complete man (please dont say the line 'you complete me, only God can make you whole, not me, not us.) And when you already find that to yourself, you would want to share that happiness or we, wanted to be added in your list of happiness too in your life.

And lastly, I wanted to serve God with him wherever He called me to. :)



May 20 new
Hello! I'd be happy to give my two cents!

Some things that can make a man very attractive to a lady:

He's a 7/7 Catholic who's *practicing* his faith. He is a gentleman - honest, true to his word, loves kids, is a natural leader and protector, he's open to advice and good criticism, but can stand his ground when it comes to his faith, morals and other issues that can affect his family. He isn't afraid to let a woman know he's interested, but he's not pushy, either. He sends a message letting a lady know he's actually read her profile (not just looked at her picture) and thinks they could be a match. When she answers, he keeps the messages going with real content (as Marge said, one sentence messages about the weather don't count - ask the lady questions so you can get to know her, and tell her about yourself), and after a decent amount of time, ask her if she's comfortable exchanging numbers. After one or two phone conversation, ask to meet. If you start a correspondence, show that you're not playing games. A guy who sends a message, talks to a girl for a week, disappears for a month, then sends another message a month later is not considered a serious suitor. Keep the relationship MOVING, and be honest and respectful. Keep these things in mind, and you'll be in good stead. ;) You don't want to let a lady slip through your fingers because it wasn't clear to her that you were interested. Good luck, gents, and God bless!
May 20 new
(quote) Rosemarie-744159 said: A happy, spiritual man who sees Christ in others. One with a Christ-conscious mind in all his actions, not a self-conscious mind. An optimist, emotionally mature, does not dwell on past baggages, ready for a bigger adventure. One who defines success in life not in material terms, but by being able to do Gods will. Family and true friends are his real treasures. Heaven and the salvation of souls are his goals. One who looks forward to more years of fulfilling Gods will, which is Love and Mercy itself, with a cheerful willingness to live a simple life of humble service to others.
Beautiful,Rosemarie! This is just the type of man I'm looking for, too. biggrin
May 20 new
Paul
I can sum it up in one word " KINDNESS". Kindness covers everything. If one is kind he is thoughtful, believes in God, compassionate, forgiving, emphatic, giving, caring, loving, honest, and is respectful. If one is truly kind he will be these things. So if you asked me I would say someone who is kind.
May 20 new
(quote) Bernadette-874299 said: Hello! I'd be happy to give my two cents!

Some things that can make a man very attractive to a lady:

He's a 7/7 Catholic who's *practicing* his faith. He is a gentleman - honest, true to his word, loves kids, is a natural leader and protector, he's open to advice and good criticism, but can stand his ground when it comes to his faith, morals and other issues that can affect his family. He isn't afraid to let a woman know he's interested, but he's not pushy, either. He sends a message letting a lady know he's actually read her profile (not just looked at her picture) and thinks they could be a match. When she answers, he keeps the messages going with real content (as Marge said, one sentence messages about the weather don't count - ask the lady questions so you can get to know her, and tell her about yourself), and after a decent amount of time, ask her if she's comfortable exchanging numbers. After one or two phone conversation, ask to meet. If you start a correspondence, show that you're not playing games. A guy who sends a message, talks to a girl for a week, disappears for a month, then sends another message a month later is not considered a serious suitor. Keep the relationship MOVING, and be honest and respectful. Keep these things in mind, and you'll be in good stead. ;) You don't want to let a lady slip through your fingers because it wasn't clear to her that you were interested. Good luck, gents, and God bless!
Oh, you are so wise beyond your years, Bernadette! Most of what you've expressed I agree with and you have captured the ideal for most women I would guess! A white knight like you've described would be welcomed here! Just hope I could live up to the standards he would most likely expect!! Good post!
May 20 new
I like a man to be a MAN. Not the wussy men this society has turned men into. He needs to be strong spiritually, emotionally and psychologically. He needs to be very confident without being arrogant. I like a man who can do traditional guy things. He can get his hands dirty and survive in the wilderness as well as in the city.

As a single mom for the past 12 years, I am tired of doing all the "guy" things. I am glad I know how to jump start a car or change a tire, pitch a tent and start a fire, but I like being a feminine lady and want to be treated as such. This man also knows how to behave in public and has good manners. He has a great sense of humor and can be playful. Knows when to be serious and when to goof off and be a kid. I'm terrible with money, so he'd have to be good with managing it without being a tight-wad. Enjoys life and the outdoors as God's magnificent playground. That he love like Jesus Loves... 1Corinthians 13 in everything - And there is more but I have a science class to in 10 min...

Like others have said... we are all different. Having already been married once its a lot easier for me to see.

Good Luck! wink

May 20 new
You are right Sheila, she is indeed wise beyond her years. I am looking for a man who knows that his personality is more important than his looks! He must live a Catholic lifestyle which may mean being open to the attractions of your heart, rather than your eyes. Although I get a kick out of the 60 year old men who are 3/4 bald, pudge belly, and state they want a slender 5'2", 45 year old woman.
May 20 new
"Although I get a kick out of the 60 year old men who are 3/4 bald, pudge belly, and state they want a slender 5'2", 45 year old woman.", by Christine.

Me, too! But if we can want Sir Galahad why shouldn't they want a tiny sweet young(er) thing?? laughing Dreaming's good for us, I hope, cuz I do lots of it tongue
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