But I would not be running!
Nice picture Peter. You look younger!
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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.
Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael
Well, yeah. And if I ever have a daughter I expect to consider that most of her boyfriends are "not in her league" ;) The words change..
Heh. It means her worldly expectations are far above what we could ever provide. Or, she is so far ahead of us in faith that we could never satisfy her as the leader of a family... Or... she is just so far ahead of us intellectually... Or... Well, you get the idea.
See? I really like this reply. My reasoning is that this is alluding to true compatibility, thus elevating the definition of "league" from the worldly to a more mature conversation of marriageability. There are people in different spiritual places and they may not always be compatible. There are folks who may have different intellectual interests and may not be compatible. "Out of our league," then becomes a matter of "in different leagues." This is more about interests that aren't shared or pursuits that may frustrate the other. I think people in the same league will expand one another's possibilities and not limit them. A spiritual director recently asked me if I would be open to someone who was in a different spiritual place than I...my answer was simply that if it was God's will then...yes. To your point that a man's limitations in faith may hinder his ability to foster faith in his family...that is a valid concern. But if during the dating and courtship process you both committed to helping foster faith in each other...such people could be said to be "in the same league."
Two very good people could be in different leagues if their desires for themselves and their futures are different. Their values, ideals, etc put them in different leagues. Two very vapid people could be exceedingly happy admiring and appreciating each others beauty. Good on them! Two very tepid people could challenge each other to greater fervor for The Lord, good on them!
Conversely I think that two people who seem in different leagues (here defined as interests, faith path etc.) but committed to bringing each other to holiness through marriage...well they would close that gap very quickly, I'd wager. Ultimately, His will be done.
Thank you for your perspective, Michael!
Great response Leyden! While the phrase usually has negative connotations, as you put it, it could just mean recognition of some form of incompatibilty between ourselves and that other person. It can actually be a very mature response, though bad choice of words, for someone who truly knows who they are and what they are looking for. Rather than an "I'm not good enough", it can be "we are at different places that will probably never intersect" (Had to throw in a geometry reference as I teach it ) It would not surprise me if you had or are on good terms with a spiritual director.
What on earth does that mean?
And, who says?
Depends on the context. My dear friend, who gave me my very first rosary today, definitely married up and he knows it. He himself was on his way into the Church and prayed the St. Jude novena -- once, not nine times, because he didn't know any better at the time. He is a ridiculously smart extroverted gentleman. Very kind. His wife is quite introverted, but ridiculously smart also. He married up, and he knows it. I think in THAT context it's perfectly fine for a man to call her his "better half".
However, I think it's more common for a man to say this to resign himself to failure to woo a woman. That is not healthy. Saying you're not good enough is a copout that doesn't help.
So, in short: saying you don't deserve her, but she gave you her heart because God is extending to you that grace you don't deserve = good.
Saying you don't deserve her, she rejected you, and God is therefore withholding grace you don't deserve = bad.
It means there is no way you think she would ever go out with you. I've come to learn that guys would be surprised at how wrong they often are about this.
YES!!! Thank you for stating this, Matt.