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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

May 26th 2013 new
A good friend recently told me the difference to single people and married people is the ability to tell the difference between a WANT and a NEED. I found this to ring very true in my experience. Your list should be short and always opened to changing when you learn more about yourself and what you really need.


May 26th 2013 new
Your set of search criteria are right on. I do want to throw a question in the air... If your heart decides a non-Catholic lady, would you marry her on her Faith, or would you hope that she converts?
From my experience of being married to a Protestant man, I can say that it was very difficult for him to come to Mass with me, and participate in our Catholic community.
My heart quietly wanted him to convert, and it never happened. I ended up going to Mass by myself, or with my children. It was very sad to see other families with their leader (husband) in the pews. My heart still have that desire ...
I hope things work for you better than did for me. After all with God everything is possible.
May 27th 2013 new
(quote) Lina-796057 said: Yes. Something in Daniel's post made me hear that some people were making being married the ultimate goal in life, and that what gets a person there doesn't always matter. I think that, as Catholics, our ultimate goal is to have a strong, loving relationship with our Creator, to subjugate our wills to His, to spend eternity with Him in heaven, and to help others achieve the same ultimate goal. If we find a human partner for this ultimate goal (if that is God's Will for us), then our "pickiness" is justified and really just a natural result in attaining this goal.

Being imperfect human beings, of course the pickiness can be disordered in some people--meaning that the pickiness disguises fear of commitment or a judgmental nature or some other quality that is actually a fault. Living within the fault, we often can't recognize that it is a fault. That's what friends are for--to be mirrors to our souls sometimes, to point out things they see that we might not. But they're imperfect beings too, so their interpretation of what they see may not be accurate, and it still falls in our laps to discern the truth.

It's an ebb and flow, a trial and error procedure, for figuring out who we are and what we need and what, specifically, God wants of each of us. Each of us has an individual path to God. It can be damaging to compare our paths to others' paths, as we can be distracted from His Way for us. Many paths going in the same Direction.
Lina you are a very wise woman. That post made me want to stand up and clap. hug
May 27th 2013 new
Sometimes I wonder if I'm being to picky. I want a good Catholic man and someone who wants kids. I sometimes think I'm single because of the fact I want someone who practices the faith.








May 27th 2013 new
(quote) Roy-964611 said: Tara - I agree with everything you said.. and of course, it doesn't matter how small the "pool" is.. you only need 1 bite and I guarantee you THAT exists.
Hello Roy - I got a "replied to" notification on your above comment. Was it meant for me or Tara? (also noticed no one by that name posted in this thread).If it was meant for me , thanks! It's Reena btw hehehe. Either way, thanks!

One bite scratchchin in that case , I'm gone fishin', folks! goldfish





May 27th 2013 new
(quote) Joan-930276 said: Sometimes I wonder if I'm being to picky. I want a good Catholic man and someone who wants kids. I sometimes think I'm single because of the fact I want someone who practices the faith.








Joan, that's what the majority of us on this site are seeking. It's NOT being too picky at all. We want the very best for ourselves and are unwilling to settle for less especially in the eyes of God.
May 27th 2013 new
(quote) Carolina-701869 said: Your set of search criteria are right on. I do want to throw a question in the air... If your heart decides a non-Catholic lady, would you marry her on her Faith, or would you hope that she converts?
From my experience of being married to a Protestant man, I can say that it was very difficult for him to come to Mass with me, and participate in our Catholic community.
My heart quietly wanted him to convert, and it never happened. I ended up going to Mass by myself, or with my children. It was very sad to see other families with their leader (husband) in the pews. My heart still have that desire ...
I hope things work for you better than did for me. After all with God everything is possible.
Hi Carolina-

It would be on faith. Yes, I've had friends who have been in that situation, and it's tough. Like I said we are still discerning. It would obviously mean a lot to me if she did convert, but following God is like a dance- I don't know the pattern, I just follow!


May 27th 2013 new
I think we can say a lot of these questions but when it comes down to it...we have to be logical about it and consider how God let's us know what makes us happy so to speak and what doesn't. And perhaps there is some sense in that famous quote of "you know when you know" you have met the one God intended for you. There is such a one out there...we can't be happy with just about anyone, it's in finding whom God intended for you.
May 27th 2013 new
Super! It seems to know what you want : )
May 27th 2013 new
I have been told by a few people that I am too picky. My ideal search is catholic, 30's, never married, educated, professional, no children. So I decided to broaden my search. In the last few years I have dated non-Catholic, divorced men with children, non practicing catholics, etc. What I have learned so far is that I should be picky. I am searching for a soulmate. Someone that God has intended me to be with. My well meaning friend who have shared that I am too picky don't typically share my religious perspective. I honestly believe that I have to maintain faith that God has a plan for us all. The knowledge that God loves me should be enough to sustain me through this life. I would rather live my life alone having a solid relationship with God, than to live trying to justify my beliefs to my my significant other. I think people should compromise on hobbies, physical attributes (brown hair versus bald), locations, politics, and such. Morals and major religious differences are not something that most people should compromise on. That's just my experience.
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