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A place to learn, mingle, and share

Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Jun 28th 2013 new
When dating it should not matter whether you were never married before. Just as it should not matter whether you are a certain height, weight, have a certain education, make a certain amount of money etc. What is most important is who you are. Just live your life and be the best person you can be. Do not worry about whether having not been married is a strike against you. The right person for you will love you regardless of whether you have been married or not before. Pray and leave the rest to God.
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Jun 28th 2013 new
(quote) Kenny-949632 said:

I was simply stating my observations ....Just as you were...I thought that civilized people are afforded this privilege...

Thank you for wishing me luck with my ""outlook""...Is it wrong to state an opinion that may not be an exact copy of someone else's ??

I wish you luck with your outlook as well....I wish everyone will experience forever bestest friend forever Sweetheart companionship...I guess we all have and envision different paths...
OK, everyone, let's take a deep breath and step back a little.

I think that there is plenty of room at CM (and beyond) for people of both camps on this issue. I personally don't think there is anything wrong with somebody who hasn't been married. Others may believe there is. That's fine. Live and let live. There are enough people who believe one way and enough who believe the other.

Let's just agree to disagree on this and move on.

God Bless,
Steve
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Jun 28th 2013 new
(quote) Johnny-975202 said:
Food for thought....So, what would people be more against? Someone never married or someone that has been divorce/annulled?
LOL! Johnny, I love it that I can always count on you to "go there"!
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Jun 28th 2013 new
(quote) Rachel-731570 said: Exactly! Instead of looking at 'never married's as people who aren't ready for marriage or as people who will not joyfully embrace all that goes into marriage, remember that God has a plan and a purpose and may have been keeping them clean,safe and ready for the correct person at the correct time when both people in the plan are ready!
Wow, that was nicely put, Rachel.
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Jun 28th 2013 new
(quote) Steve-111719 said: OK, everyone, let's take a deep breath and step back a little.

I think that there is plenty of room at CM (and beyond) for people of both camps on this issue. I personally don't think there is anything wrong with somebody who hasn't been married. Others may believe there is. That's fine. Live and let live. There are enough people who believe one way and enough who believe the other.

Let's just agree to disagree on this and move on.

God Bless,
Steve
Well said. Everyone is entitled to his or her individual preferences.
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Jun 28th 2013 new
(quote) Josephine-586127 said:

Yes, I believe that is the main reason for all of us never been marrieds !!!



You know, I've often wondered if I missed out on the one God intended for me when I was attached to the wrong person. But I also know that "all things work for the good who love God and are called according to His purpose." I know that He can take our wrong turns and re-direct to us other people.

Life is wonderful with or without a spouse, I intend to continue living it to the fullest.


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Jun 28th 2013 new
Every individual has factors in their life that make them choose certain people to explore as potential mates over others. There are the obvious superficial, yet legimate ones like preferring "fit and toned" over "a few extra pounds" or even blondes over brunettes. Then there are those that are less superficial such as age. Just being on Catholic Match says you prefer someone of your own faith over another kind of Christian.
For myself, the factors I would look first would be age, interests, distance and yes, previous marital status. I would prefer a man who is widowed, but would not rule out divorced. Why? Because when reviewing only that factor, it would seem more likely that he would be dealing with his grief of the primary person who he can never see again in this lifetime, just as I am. As widow/ers we can never resolve any unresolved issures with that person. There is a grief in divorce,but there is still the possibility of resolving ssues. In divorce there is anger that does not exist with being widowed. Does that mean that I would never consider a divorced man? of course not. If other factors were matchs, you overcome. Why would I hesitate with never married? Second (third or fourth) marriages require the ability to deal with multiple and many aged children. I would worry that someone of in my age group that had not spent his life raising children would have a difficult time existing or understanding my family or my life. Would I rule him out? No, not if other factors matched and he was willing to try.But getting to the point of finding that out probably would be hampered by his unmarried status.
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Jun 28th 2013 new
(quote) Steve-111719 said: I've never really thought too much about it, Ann, but I hope not. I have been asked questions on dates about never having been married, though. What I respond with is the truth -- that I haven't found the right one yet or she hasn't found me yet. Yep, I know that that sounds like a Michael Buble song and that's fine. One CM lady even asked me why ALL of my past relationships didn't work out. That was on our 2nd F2F date. And here I was just trying to discern if I liked her or not.

Sometimes the good Lord makes us wait (sometimes it feels like for waaaay too long, but He knows better than we do) for the right one to come along. After all, it's not on OUR time that we'll find the right one but on His time.

I'd say that if a guy has a problem with you never being married before (what an insignificant thing to hold against someone, if you ask me), then he's not the one for you anyway. I mean, would you want to spend your life with someone who though less of you just because you hadn't been married before?

God Bless,
Steve
don't sweat the small stuff!

one of my brothers got married at age 50 for the first time. He had seen my marriage fall apart after 8 short years and had several relationships turn sour for him as well during his life. He chose to remain single until our dad passed away. Our dad told him that he should think about getting married and having a family so it wasn't long after that that he found his wife.
It is all in "your time" when things will change for you.
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Jun 28th 2013 new
Hi y'all,

Pick any attribute, even "good" ones.

And there'll be someone who considers it a negative in the dating world. rolling eyes



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discoball discoball duck - Disco, Disco Duck
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Jun 28th 2013 new
Alimony Payment. NO
Child Support. NO
Sailing Club Membership. YES
Meeting that Special Lovely Lady PRICELESS
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