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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Jul 4th 2013 new
Chris at least she cannot say that you are too old for her at 30. haha

Jul 4th 2013 new
(quote) Laura-598039 said: Okay, so I signed up for this site today.
I've never been in a relationship. I've been on dates with a few people but I was never head over heels for any of them.

I know that's what I want. I want to be head over heels. I want to find that person that I can't wait to talk to every day. Someone that puts a curl in my toes and a smile on my face.

But I am scared too. This is a big step for me putting myself out there. I guess what I am looking for is some support and advice on how to use this site. I don't have any "single" friends so I don't have anyone to go through this process with me or who has advice.

In short any help you can give me is much appreciated.

Hello Laura - first off, welcome to CM. wave You're very pretty biggrin

I will be praying for you. The things you mentioned are great - head over heels, can't wait to to talk everyday, puts a curl in my toes and a smile on my face...

I am reminded of what Pope Benedict said in a blog article I read here - about emotions. Falling in love, being an emotion is not eternal - it needs to be purified. What I learned is that emotions are a gift from God and I've been praying that God grant me the grace to use these emotions in His order - the way it's supposed to be. So I must caution if I may, over the notion of "head over heels etc" because we tend to think of "good feelings, spark etc " as a big indicator to continue that "sumthin'-sumthin' " with another person as oppose to letting an attraction, communication etc grow at the pace God wanted it. When it gets purified in the form God want it, is where we find what real love is about. Instead of making hasty decisions based on restless and often distracting feelings of infatuation and attraction towards a person ( without really trying to get to know who they really are).

Don't write someone off so hastily, see them in the eyes of God. Have fun with it :). God bless you!


Jul 5th 2013 new
Laura, you have done a wonderful job with your profile. Very lovely photos.

If it helps, my 25 year-old nephew married a beautiful girl from the Akron area, whom he met on CM. I believe the site works. I'm convinced it will work for you.

God bless, Doug.
Jul 5th 2013 new
Reena very good advice.
Jul 5th 2013 new
You, Chris, and Mark should all join www.meetup.com

It will introduce you to local Singles.
Jul 5th 2013 new
I disagree: you DO know what you are doing. You have described how you should feel when you marry, a feeling that the room gets a couple watts brighter and warmer when your love walks in. My daughter was telling me of a friend who announced her engagement, and it sounds like this girl is settling for an ok guy because they are at the right age to be getting married and have already dated a while, but theres no excitement or happiness when she sees him. Not good. You already know that there should be both deep feeling and a sense of joy in a relationship, so hats off to you.

My other bit of advice is to do something to be out in the real world, where you meet new people. Join a gym, take a class. If you don't meet a guy there, you will meet other single women, and if you are dating, it is good to have single gfs to use as a sounding board or to go out with if Prince Charming doesn't appear.
Good luck
Jul 5th 2013 new
If I could go back and meet myself at your age this is what I would say.

Take your time. There is no rush to throw yourself into a relationship.
Go slow
Get to know people before commiting yourself.
Have fun. Join groups get involved in lots of activities.
Find out who you are first and what you want if you know that already then you're ahead of the game.
Never compromise on values.
Look for a guy that respects you and takes you as you are.
Don't expect or plan to change anyone that never works on either end.
Pray before a date for God to reveal if this person is a good fit for you as a friend or something more.....this really works and has saved me a ton of time.
Best of luck.
Jul 5th 2013 new
Welcome. I'm sure you will do fine here. Relax, have fun, and be yourself.

I would recommend that you initially focus on finding someone with a strong Catholic faith. A strong, shared Faith will almost guarantee that you will both be moving in the same direction in the long run. Second, only by Faith can one truly understand Love. And understanding Love will help you discern and understand the emotions, hormones, and attractions that you will experience. Keep your heart in Christ, and Love will guide you.
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