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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

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Jul 16th 2013 new
Consider the example that you will be setting for your children and grand-children (if you have them). When one of your grandkids wants to live with their girl/boy friend, they can justify it to their parents by saying.... "Well Grandpa does it!".

I would say that you would be much better off to sort through the legal/financial issues so that your relationship would not be misunderstood by others... expecially your younger relatives that will be using you as an example.

Just my thoughts.

Ed
Jul 16th 2013 new
(quote) ED-20630 said: Consider the example that you will be setting for your children and grand-children (if you have them). When one of your grandkids wants to live with their girl/boy friend, they can justify it to their parents by saying.... "Well Grandpa does it!".

I would say that you would be much better off to sort through the legal/financial issues so that your relationship would not be misunderstood by others... expecially your younger relatives that will be using you as an example.

Just my thoughts.

Ed
Great "thoughts" Ed. And I would add..to consider what you will say to your Lord and Savior when He ask you to account for this action/choice...the excuse that you were just trying to protect "perishable goods" for your children and grandchildren would sound very flat..almost as flat as it sounds now...I want you to know I say this to you in love and want to remind you of something you already know....
Your good example is your BEST legacy to your family. Praying
Jul 16th 2013 new
(quote) Quentin-43809 said: I am just wondering if living together when you are seniors (65 and older) isn't the best life style that older people can have. The only difference between the two would be having sex I suppose. The church frowns upon that. Of course some people are pretty sexually active into their later years and others aren't . Marriage at a advanced age carries all kinds of problems in the legal sense of the word. There are wills and trusts involved depending on which spouse has the most children etc. Of course there are all kinds of other things that come into play so I would like to ask CM members to bring up the complexities of commitment in the later years of ones life.

Thank you
Reality is your talking about dating with the final commitment to marriage due to legalities. I got news for you...dating without any final commitment just leaves a back door open to the relationship....and she can walk out anytime as well...and she should. Legal issues should never stand as the primary focus in a relationship..you both have to trust God and keep him the first priority..not your trusts, monies, etc.
Jul 16th 2013 new
(quote) Laura-857740 said: Reality is your talking about dating with the final commitment to marriage due to legalities. I got news for you...dating without any final commitment just leaves a back door open to the relationship....and she can walk out anytime as well...and she should. Legal issues should never stand as the primary focus in a relationship..you both have to trust God and keep him the first priority..not your trusts, monies, etc.
Amen Laura!
Jul 16th 2013 new
(quote) Quentin-43809 said: Good for you Christine, I was giving one option. We are not all the same. Anyway to each his own way of looking at this subject as there are many answers to the question. The church just has it two ways. Considering all the scandal in the church in recent years and before I think there are less important things that they are consentrating on and that is why the church seems to be loosing younger members all over the globe. It fails to modernize and revamp with the times.
The Church does not change for people, people have to believe in the Church and God and the teachings...
Jul 16th 2013 new
Carol, Congratulations! Did you meet your intended on this site? You bring up some valid points that individuals need to consider.
Jul 16th 2013 new
Sue, You speak the truth.
Jul 16th 2013 new
Pedyne, You are a wise woman. Blessings to you.
Jul 16th 2013 new
Cathy, Sometimes I think women have more of a conscience then men. Could that be possible? In my experiences, I was always the one to point out the evil. Men tend to conveniently overlook things. I have heard priests say to seniors you can have a union where you live together, share things, travel, cook, enjoy shows, plays etc. But if you're not married you can't engage in sexual activities. Some seniors, not all are not interested in sex. They had their day in the sun so to speak and, in the latter years, they seem to be interested in the sharing and the caring aspect of a relationship. Also, in their earlier years when they were married, they had children and worked together with their spouse to acquire a home and other financial assets. So, rightfully, their children or whoever else should be entitled to those successes. Does anyone agree with my thought process or am I off base?
Jul 16th 2013 new
(quote) Maryjane-408997 said: Cathy, Sometimes I think women have more of a conscience then men. Could that be possible? In my experiences, I was always the one to point out the evil. Men tend to conveniently overlook things. I have heard priests say to seniors you can have a union where you live together, share things, travel, cook, enjoy shows, plays etc. But if you're not married you can't engage in sexual activities. Some seniors, not all are not interested in sex. They had their day in the sun so to speak and, in the latter years, they seem to be interested in the sharing and the caring aspect of a relationship. Also, in their earlier years when they were married, they had children and worked together with their spouse to acquire a home and other financial assets. So, rightfully, their children or whoever else should be entitled to those successes. Does anyone agree with my thought process or am I off base?
MaryJane, you gave me something to think about. But, I can't think of any priest, that I have known in my whole life to say it would be ok to live with someone when you are not married. I just don't think age gives you any extra advantage to do something that people in their 20s, 30s, etc., would be looked down upon as living in sin. I just don't have the answers here. I just really don't. I think if people are just friends, maybe. But it is there own consciousness's and not me to judge nor would I. I just think about my lovely grandmother who was alone for 30 years by her choice and she was the best example of living a celibate life, went to church, and spoiled us grandkids rutton! I think I more than likely wouldn't have had the respect and love or it would be really hard on me if she lived with a man, even as a roommate. Kids and grandkids are impressionable. You lived your life, why change your morals.


Just my two cents here. I don't have the answer, but I know as a granddaughter, it would have changed my thinking on a lot of things. I think about my only and dearest grandmother, because the other ones passed when I was a baby, all the time. She was the best role model for me and she has been gone since 95! We had some great times and she was an independent little lady who loved life!! I want that on my way out! I want to go out knowing I was loved by my grandkids and died a peaceful life! Just saying.


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