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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Jul 25th 2013 new
It depends on the amount of "investment" I have with the person. If there were just a few E-mails between us, then I just brush it off and say it's God's way of protecting me from getting involved with someone who is not a match, but after 20 or 30 E-mails and a F2F meeting, I can feel somewhat down.
Jul 25th 2013 new
It's either not destined by God, or the person said no at the time, for their own reasons which you will likely never know. I let it go; life goes on. Usually it's the end between the two, if ever there, but sometimes the other person works out their stuff or sees you differently and simply changes their mind in time. One cannot cling to this "potentiality", but yes, there have been situations for this to happen.
Jul 25th 2013 new
(quote) Mary-363093 said: I never consider it as any personal insult or reflection of my worth.

I acknowledge that - for whatever reason, (usually one can't pinpoint actually WHY) - they do not feel, or I do not find myself feeling - enough of a pull to want to continue exploring a potential / or romantic relationship.

We simply are not attracted to every member of the opposite sex, thank goodness, or things would get very weird. I meet new people constantly, but it's rare for me to feel a spark, or that special pull. It's nobody's fault, no one is in the wrong, or flawed, nobody treated the other badly, or led them on while getting to know them and build a friendship through various communications, WHATEVER the reason - we simply aren't a romantic match. Period.

So, ideally, we should wish each other well, and move along. Consider each encounter like that as one more step on the road to your future! It's PROGRESS!

One big point I want to make - if you do not get a reply online - assume they are not a paying member, therefore, they are unable to reply. Then LET IT GO. Don't automatically think they are rude or find you unattractive. That's actually judging THEM, isn't it?

One saying I've always liked: Sometimes 'rejection is God's protection'

Finally - what or how other people think of me is none of my business. Don't give strangers the power to cause you to feel bad about yourself for any reason. YOU know your worth, you know your strengths - be your biggest cheerleader and get back out there!
Hi Mary,
That has to be the best response/opinion that I heard ever. I would have to agree your are probably right.
Jul 25th 2013 new

I remember that none of us are truly represented as wonderfully as we come across in real life. That said, rejection is really just a lesson about choosing a bit more wisely down the road. If a response is less than cordial (whether that be in a message or a chat room), I am a firm believer that breathing cleanses those ugly little thoughts of hurt or anger that want to take over breath in slowly through the nose saying Jesus and exhale slowly through the mouth saying Mercy. You will be surprised how quickly the uglies are replaced with the pure joy of the special treasure you know you are inside. After all, you are here to meet that special "one" so when someone is not interested at the start, they were never meant to reside within your heart.

Jul 25th 2013 new
Well said Monica! Even rhymes at the end!
Jul 26th 2013 new
It's hard not to take it personally, but we have to remember that people are looking at pictures and words and can't see our hearts and souls. That we are more than a picture and some words. We are wonderfully blessed human beings!
Trish
Jul 26th 2013 new
Definitely not dwell on it and take it personally. I find it good to unwind and separate yourself from the situation, and process it when you are in a better state of mind.

Resilience is key - don't let it get you down! Keep moving and stay confident. Keep trusting that God is guiding you, even if you feel blind - just walk towards His voice.
Jul 26th 2013 new

When I first joined, I thought a non-reply was a rejection. Now, I just consider non-replies the norm here on CM and think nothing of it. As William said, how can it be a rejection if they don't know you? Why should we expect everyone we are interested in to have mutual feelings? My take on that famous expression, "It not me, it's you". laughing

I like what Frank said, "it depends on the amount of investment I have with the person". If you send out an emote (send a message for heaven's sake!), what is that- less than a minute investment? Why moan and sulk over that? But if you have been in conversation with a person for several weeks and they cut off communication though you had a connection, that does hurt and takes time to get over.

While we may be faces and words at first, at every moment we are real human beings with feelings, children of God, and supposed to be brothers and sisters in Christ.

Jul 26th 2013 new
Not very well...I am definitely not used to people who are more interested, it seems, in being pen pals than living life in the real world. A little too hard for me.
Jul 26th 2013 new
What's a cricket? To me, rejection is merely a situation where someone isn't buying what I'm selling. That's why they have 31 flavors of ice cream. We all have different taste. Doesn't mean any one of us is no good, or unworthy,or unloveable. Just means our path is not their path, pure and simple.
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