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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Aug 19th 2013 new
Rachel:

Every photo is reviewed by a member of our staff however some photo go live before the are reviewed and some after based by criteria in our software. It is possible you saw the photo before it was reviewed. That being said the best thing to do is click the report this profile link from their profile. You will be shown all their photos and you can select any offending photos. The members is not notified that you reporter their profile or photos. In some cases our staff will agree that it is inappropriate while other times they may not but at least you will know for sure that it was reviewed. All photos that are shirtless are not permitted.
Aug 19th 2013 new
(quote) Brian-278516 said: Rachel:

Every photo is reviewed by a member of our staff however some photo go live before the are reviewed and some after based by criteria in our software. It is possible you saw the photo before it was reviewed. That being said the best thing to do is click the report this profile link from their profile. You will be shown all their photos and you can select any offending photos. The members is not notified that you reporter their profile or photos. In some cases our staff will agree that it is inappropriate while other times they may not but at least you will know for sure that it was reviewed. All photos that are shirtless are not permitted.
Thank you Brian, this means no more bathroom or gym photos eyepopping laughing laughing Your doing them a favor btw, hehe
Aug 19th 2013 new
(quote) Colleen-329593 said: Kristin, you hit it square on the head! I actually saw a guy's profile that said he wanted a woman with a "barbie doll" figure and that he wanted her to "snap back down to it" after every kid. One guy I met off here said I wasn't his ideal because I wasn't blonde. Yes, men, please get to know us beyond our profile shells. You might discover something, a treasure that you never thought you could find! I have been on ad off this site for like 5 or six years (whenever my annullment was completed) I am not ugly, I have 3 great well behaved children, I am a good mom, good cook, can run a household, am a great person to hang out with and get to know. I have a lot to offer a guy if he would just give me a chance. Men, invest in us real women, you might discover a treasure you never thought existed. I don't respond much to these forums,but this one kind of struck me. A lot of people tell me that any guy would be lucky to have me....but I get passed over again and again. Sometimes I just feel like giving up, shoving up the walls and ignoring men altogether. Dealing with constant rejection is not easy.
Colleen .... Hang in there ... You have a very, very nice profile and I am sure some of these guys in your age range will come to their senses and contact you! ... It will happen for you!

Richard
Aug 19th 2013 new
(quote) Richard-632838 said:

Sorry for the long reply (I know most will probably skip it) but after reading through all the posts I want to make a few comments.

First, it has come up repeatedly in the forums women believe that us men are only looking for this "dream girl" but that is not true (for most of us). We are looking for compatibility and MOST one here are not going to be a match. I have yet to hear of any man's profile that reads only, "Looking for a Catholic woman with a pulse". The reality (to the detriment of the site) is people here do come with high expectations/standards.

Second, I do agree this is the best "Catholic" site, but am wondering whether this is really the best tool (as the analogy in the blog puts it) for me. Is CM a saw, when what I really need is a hammer? Doesn't matter if you know how to use a tool if you don't have the right one. Perhaps people need to discern if God is really calling them to be on this site. Just because it is here, does not mean it is for everyone.

Third, as to the lack of "dating" on this site, I find it challenging to get a date on here. My top three reasons for not dating a lot on this site are:

1) Lack of response. I just don't get a lot of responses (5% at best) despite all the tips and suggestion CM and others give like sending an actual message with something based on their profile. I attribute it to a low percentage of paying members and/or I am not up to what others are looking for.

2) No LDRs- I don't have several hundreds of dollars to spend to fly or drive to another part of the country just to go out on a date. Personal face to face time is very important to me and LDRs just don't cut for me (based on my personality type).

3) I like to stay in my age range (I don't think I need to elaborate on that)

This thread was helpful because it did give me the idea to get a picture of me as if I was hooked on some fisherman's line holding me up as a prize. Maybe then I might look like a catch.


laughing laughing Richard, you must have read my posts in the other forums on how I was sick and tired of seeing fishermen's pictures, hehe
Aug 19th 2013 new
(quote) Clair-6292 said: It started as St. Raphael
And still is, actually...

www.straphael.net

Aug 20th 2013 new
(quote) Cathy-564420 said: Richard, you must have read my posts in the other forums on how I was sick and tired of seeing fishermen's pictures, hehe
What? You mean wearing fishing pants doesn't get a thumbs up from women? Or is it the fish? Just when I was going to take a picture with one of those mounted talking fish. laughing What other forums are you referring to? I'm curious to know if fisherman's pictures are the only faux pas.

Aug 20th 2013 new
(quote) Rachel-55571 said: To add to this...women may have a higher rate of dissatisfaction due to gender roles and the feeling that we can't really ask a guy out. Sure, I've smiled, said hello, commented guys on their profiles, but that's about the limit many women are going to do. A lot of us (note: a lot, but maybe not all women) are not going to "ask a guy out." I've done the "you maybe wanna grab a coffee thing" with guys I've met in person in my community/at church in the past, and it usually doesn't lead to anything more than one outing. Long story short, it's the men who typically take the lead, have the ability and the role to ask women out. Yes, a man may get rejected, but hello, you all (men) can ask women out. So, yeah, maybe you are meeting more people on here and actually going out on dates. So, yeah, you're going to be more satisfied with the experience even if you don't end up marrying a woman you met here.

I'm not trying to generalize or offend anyone here. Apologies if it comes across that way, but I think there's a bit of truth in my comment.
Women wonder why men don't write (and, I assume, oh so few do) / why men don't ask them out / why men don't ask them out again.

Men wonder why women don't respond (and, I can certainly attest, oh so, so, so few do) / why they don't agree to go out / why they don't agree to go out again.

Everyone wonders why everyone else poofs.

I simply have a hard time believing this litany of woes adds up to a more favored position for either gender. This is simply an irascibly tough business for everyone.
Aug 20th 2013 new
(quote) Colleen-329593 said: Kristin, you hit it square on the head! I actually saw a guy's profile that said he wanted a woman with a "barbie doll" figure and that he wanted her to "snap back down to it" after every kid. One guy I met off here said I wasn't his ideal because I wasn't blonde. Yes, men, please get to know us beyond our profile shells. You might discover something, a treasure that you never thought you could find! I have been on ad off this site for like 5 or six years (whenever my annullment was completed) I am not ugly, I have 3 great well behaved children, I am a good mom, good cook, can run a household, am a great person to hang out with and get to know. I have a lot to offer a guy if he would just give me a chance. Men, invest in us real women, you might discover a treasure you never thought existed. I don't respond much to these forums,but this one kind of struck me. A lot of people tell me that any guy would be lucky to have me....but I get passed over again and again. Sometimes I just feel like giving up, shoving up the walls and ignoring men altogether. Dealing with constant rejection is not easy.
Colleen,
Thank you for being the voice of every woman here on CM; we definitely feel for you as we are walking in your shoes as well. Yes, we are all "treasures" because we are daughters of a KING and the men are losing out in a huge way. BLessings to you.
Aug 21st 2013 new
(quote) Joan-529855 said: Colleen,
Thank you for being the voice of every woman here on CM; we definitely feel for you as we are walking in your shoes as well. Yes, we are all "treasures" because we are daughters of a KING and the men are losing out in a huge way. BLessings to you.
Joan ...just a question ... Why do you say "the men are losing out in a huge way"? .... Aren't the women likewise losing out in a huge way? Aren't we all losing out when we don't make a connection? ...

Just wondering ...

Richard
Aug 21st 2013 new
(quote) Richard-15378 said: Joan ...just a question ... Why do you say "the men are losing out in a huge way"? .... Aren't the women likewise losing out in a huge way? Aren't we all losing out when we don't make a connection? ...

Just wondering ...

Richard
Richard, because it is the men who are preventing the connection by making requirements of the women. And yes we are all losing out because the men insist on the fantasy of a "perfect wife" (who "snaps back after having babies" boggled really?)
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