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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Oct 22 new
(quote) Kerry-1020795 said: It's certainly possible to be attracted to someone based on his or her profile. It depends on lots of things, including the profile-writer's adroitness with words, and also obviously the reader's history and imagination. I tune out when a profile reads like advertising copy, or when it's dashed off de rigueur in a bored and haphazard manner. On the other hand, my interest is piqued by creativity. Creativity is hugely attractive in my humble opinion, and a profile is as good a way as any to put it on display.
I'm a hands on 'kinda woman'.......working with physically challenged and folks with autism.....but I'll type with my left hand and maybe something creative will result
Oct 22 new
(quote) Jan-805954 said: I agree, Johnny. In my experience it has gone both ways. But, it seems that the longer the dialogue before FTF, the better chance for "success". Getting to know someone well by what they write or say on the phone gives me a good clue as to whether they will have the "attraction" factor in person.
Strongly agree.
Oct 22 new
(quote) David-174079 said: Hi again, Kristen,

This seems like a good context to recycle the famous JPII quote:

There is no dignity when the human dimension is eliminated from the person. In short, the problem with pornography is not that it shows too much of the person, but that it shows far too little.
― John Paul II

Is this what you are intuiting? That a person's human dimension can be diminished by the Internet medium? One's humanity is not eliminated, but I do feel objectification and isolation of parts (face, words) from the whole person can distort reality. On the other hand, I think CM, unlike a bar scene, can serve to magnify the beauty of the mind, heart and soul. Giving truly intelligent, morally good, and inwardly beautiful a safe place to shine!







Uh... people can be objectified quite a bit in person. One good thing about Catholic Match is that some of the most basic aspects about a person can be put right out front, just like a resume, e.g., age, position on Catholic issues of faith, political inclination, hobbies. What we don't know about a person from their profile, is how much value some of these issues weigh in. That is where dialogue comes into play; with hope most people will be both honest and diplomatic.
Oct 22 new
(quote) Kristen-878108 said: I agree - I really don't think there are many improvements one can make to the profile process, other than adding the video element - I think that would be a great idea!! Rather, I think the important thing for a person who wants to be successful in actually finding a match is taking a risk to get to know a person even though the profile may not be particularly interesting. Look for areas of compatibility rather than the "razzle-dazzle" effect!
After reading Adams comments it made me wonder. Like you are saying about the "razzle-dazzle" effect. I have been on secular sites and it seems to be more of a "sales" pitch of "look how much I have and look at how much I do, I am so handsome, I am so beautiful, I work out 50 hours a week, I sky dive etc, etc. CM, being a Christian site, people are more humble, spiritual and keeping to the reality of daily life. Is it worldly vs not worldly? I prefer real people.
Oct 22 new
(quote) Kathy-99973 said: Every word in the profile should be absolutely true. When I first got into this online dating, I tried to write it so that a man could not confront me at a later time and say that I lied. I guess that was my standard, so I was vague, but truthful.

As my experiences with online dating occurred over the years, I learned a few lessons. It really doesn't matter (to some extent) what's in the profile, emails, etc., what matters is the F2F. That's really Day One in the relationship. You usually sit there and try to reconcile in your mind that the person that you knew on paper is actually the person who is sitting right in front of you. This also occurs with the initial phone call. Ideally, a person is consistent, from profile to emails, to chats, to phone calls, to meeting in person. The glowing profile means nothing if he doesn't treat you right, period. It's very easy to create a false persona on paper, which is why I don't place a lot of credence into a profile. Yes, I expect it to be the truth, but I guess that I am not going to be as impressed over them as I used to be. I have been fortunate to meet some CM men, and I will say that the ones who I knew from the Forums were pretty much what I expected. I will tell you, though, it's waay too tempting to talk about the Forums when you meet a fellow Forum person!

So, anyway, it's more important to watch what a man does (watch his feet), than what he says. Most of us will take action over pretty words any day!



Conversely, many people will put a very strong emphasis on a person's words. The words, "I do," are two short, simple words, but they have loads of meaning to them. I find that the profiles that I have read, appear to be more true to life, if not put together like a marketing presentation. That is, they are simply worded, maybe a little comedy is fun to read, and are not too vague. They should read just as a person would speak. More photos are always better than less; that is something that I am guilty of.
Oct 22 new
(quote) Kathy-99973 said: Very true! It's really important for people to realize that instead of being on the phone for two hours (or chatting online for two hours), they could have gotten in the car and met someplace. Valuable lesson to learn...
Yes, but wouldn't someone's reluctance to do that, leave you with a big giant question mark?????????? I am assuming the plan wouldn't be to drop whatever you are doing at the moment, and go have coffee....or something like that.
Oct 22 new
(quote) David-174079 said: Interesting how the Internet is a lifesaver for small town Catholics? Or, for those who have few practicing Catholics nearby. It is an amazing miracle to me still, to wake up to a cup of coffee, another 75 degree sunny day in paradise, and visit with a fellow believer in China.
Just for fun, "paradise"? I am your neighbor, as far as cities. I had to chuckle when John McCain visited here during Romney campaigning, and he said to us San Diegans, "please be kind to the Zonies, when we visit your town." I used to have a family member who lived nearby your city. Although I like your city in particular, I would only advise that anyone visit there during the Fall or Winter months, possibly Spring. I hope that I don't stunt your line of visitors, but many may not like100 degree temperatures that are typical there. But then again, it's only dry heat!
Oct 22 new
(quote) Bernard-2709 said: They did have a video option in the past.It was short lived though.Not sure why.
Probably, not many had easy access to video making, as we do now. Many smartphones are now equipped with the capability to easily make a short video. 'Not saying that I would do it now though, even though I have the capability. I would be too chicken!!!!!!!
Oct 22 new
(quote) Jacqueline-556574 said:  Although I like your city in particular, I would only advise that anyone visit there during the Fall or Winter months, possibly Spring. I hope that I don't stunt your line of visitors, but many may not like100 degree temperatures that are typical there. But then again, it's only dry heat!
Sedonna probably does not get as hot as Phoenix metro or Yuma. Hottest it got in Yuma when I still lived there was 122F.
Oct 22 new
(quote) Johnny-975202 said: Sedonna probably does not get as hot as Phoenix metro or Yuma. Hottest it got in Yuma when I still lived there was 122F.
122F, is 52 degrees too hot for me!
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