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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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Nov 4th 2013 new
(quote) John-184825 said: After digressions that took this topic off course, I return to the original subject matter with some related questions.

Over the years, how has deeper insight about yourself contributed to your ability to have a fuller social life?
Career, relationships, losses, achievements, failures, responsibilities, the Holy Spirit , and life in generalall will reveal selfAs I take stock at certain milestonesand self examine to ascertain goals for ministry, relationship, career, etc.,up pops the good,the bad, and the ugly

So, over the years, any insight gained has enabled me to make others laugh, cry, and shake their heads in disbeliefI am a "basket case" or as certain friends here in the South say (in affection, at least that is why they tell me!)"You are a mess, just a mess!" And that, really is the true state of affairswhich is why I have no problem with the first part of our Mass that you mentioned, John, I am a "mess" without HimI know for sure after looking at what I bring to the table.It is ALL G.R.A.C.Egifts received at Christ's expense.

This self awareness has not applied in a "dating world" for meas a widow coming out of many years in married lifebut my social lifeas in my opportunities for conversation and contact with others in my community or profession is not encumbered by the fears and self consciousness of youthI enjoy mixing, sharing, and just socializing,,,and He covers me despite myself and all that awareness :-) Thank, God!


Nov 5th 2013 new
(quote) Barbara-863769 said: Career, relationships, losses, achievements, failures, responsibilities, the Holy Spirit , and life in generalall will reveal selfAs I take stock at certain milestonesand self examine to ascertain goals for ministry, relationship, career, etc.,up pops the good,the bad, and the ugly

So, over the years, any insight gained has enabled me to make others laugh, cry, and shake their heads in disbeliefI am a "basket case" or as certain friends here in the South say (in affection, at least that is why they tell me!)"You are a mess, just a mess!" And that, really is the true state of affairswhich is why I have no problem with the first part of our Mass that you mentioned, John, I am a "mess" without HimI know for sure after looking at what I bring to the table.It is ALL G.R.A.C.Egifts received at Christ's expense.

This self awareness has not applied in a "dating world" for meas a widow coming out of many years in married lifebut my social lifeas in my opportunities for conversation and contact with others in my community or profession is not encumbered by the fears and self consciousness of youthI enjoy mixing, sharing, and just socializing,,,and He covers me despite myself and all that awareness :-) Thank, God!


Thanks for writing a rich and rather personal post.

I like your words, my social life ... is not encumbered by the fears and self consciousness of youth. I suppose that should be called the result of personal growth, some of which might have included what we call, "insight" and some of which might have happened in a very hidden way without conscious awareness. :)
Nov 5th 2013 new
(quote) John-184825 said: Blokes are more likely to get strokes from the beaut of their pursue if they set aside the cider and other brew too. Or as Hamlet said, "VB or with thee, that is the question!"
She's apples mate,I'll stick with the cider.(VB's horrible!) surprised wide eyed
The temperament test has helped me understand myself ,and confirmed my suspicions that loud ,domineering
overbearing people are not good for my being to be around.Insight into ones self is crucial,helping to determine
what your kind of person is ,who would best be suited to be a spouse. scratchchin
Nov 5th 2013 new
(quote) Anne-976912 said: She's apples mate,I'll stick with the cider.(VB's horrible!)
The temperament test has helped me understand myself ,and confirmed my suspicions that loud ,domineering
overbearing people are not good for my being to be around.Insight into ones self is crucial,helping to determine
what your kind of person is ,who would best be suited to be a spouse.
Thank for the relevant reply.

Maybe the loud, domineering and overbearing people should date one another. Without implying that all or even most cholerics have those traits, I once wrote a topic that included questions about cholerics dating each other: www.catholicmatch.com

Wondering whether making VB egress and XXXX ingress amounts to a fixxxx or evokes from you a worser, "Nixxxx", eyebrow

John

Nov 5th 2013 new
(quote) John-184825 said: Thanks for taking the time to add your experiences. Some of your remarks were of the more common kind about what to do and not do. The one highlighted above was the specific sort I was looking for and it indicates that have some idea that if the other party has little or no insight about himself, it will not be possible to have a healthy relationship. Unfortunately in most cases he will have no clue about this deficiency of insight.

Do you think that it might be the case that for Mr. Right to become Mr. Rite his middle name needs be Insight?

Turning things insight and out while staying out of sight,

John
Thanks John for your insight;) and corrections on my not-so-insight! LOL.

Mr. Right needs to know I will always be right;), Right? And it ok if he has some insight as well, not that I will listen;) wink laughing eyepopping JK of course!

Can't keep up to your insights and just being funny! ha
Nov 5th 2013 new
(quote) Cathy-564420 said: Thanks John for your insight;) and corrections on my not-so-insight! LOL.

Mr. Right needs to know I will always be right;), Right? And it ok if he has some insight as well, not that I will listen;) JK of course!

Can't keep up to your insights and just being funny! ha
Hi Cathy,

I was not saying that what you wrote were not real insights, but just that they were insights about things to do and things to avoid doing where I was asking your opinion about whether both parties can have a better relationship if they have a lot of insights into themselves. I'd guess that most people had never even thought about this question and so their answers would be of the first-attempt-before-a-lot-or-reflection variety. Most of the answers seemed to of that kind compared to how people would comment about things that have been in,their minds many times in the past.

If someone were to ask me what good my question might serve, I'd say that it might see a new, even if tiny, dimension to what is (or what isn't) happening during a date; e.g, he may not be listening to you, not because he is inconsiderate, but because his whole family background stressed always being an active doer, and he is unconscious that he also needs a passive side to his personality as is required in listening. If sometime in the future he has an insight about this need to have both an active a passive side to relate to a woman, he may be able to listen. Of course this can become laughable because straining with all one's might to be passive sounds like an oxymoron. eyebrow

Trying to make my passive side more massive, cool

John







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