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This room is dedicated to those who are facing the challenge of raising children without the support of a spouse. This is a place to share ideas and lend mutual support.

Saint Rita is known to be a patroness for abused wives and mourning women.
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Dec 26th 2013 new
Praying Bless you, Isabel Praying

when my boys were young my friends helped a lot, and sports were very therapeutic cool

rose Teen angst was a toughie [lots of therapy for adoption issues for one son especially $$$] rose

scratchchin My church and community was less than helpful except extremely loyal friends [all female].

theheart But God is good theheart and both developmentally challenged
sons are now part time taxpayers and starting to thrive.
Dec 28th 2013 new
Wow. Isabel. I agree with all you said.

My son is 4 years old..... and he is a HANDFUL!!! (I also have a 2 y.o. girl but she is an angel). I recently moved back to my parents after struggling enormously on my own for 3 years. Thank God he now has men in his life (uncles and granddad) and it shows in his behaviour. They can show him how to do boy stuff and toughen him up a bit wink

I firmly believe a woman cannot be a father and a man cannot be a mother, no matter how hard they try. There is a reason God made us different and a child needs both in their life for a good balance.

God Bless all the single mums out there and keep trying!!! God will always be there for us, even if men cannot.




Dec 29th 2013 new
(quote) Becky-1017164 said: I would love to hear more about moms have managed it. I have a 14 year old son. He is my oldest in a household full of girls (only sisters) and his father is not at all involved in his life. :( I am struggling mightily to be both a mother and a father. We don't have any close friends in our new city and although my father tries to fill in as much as possible it's hard because he is older. We do have close friends who keep in contact and try to keep up with my son and guide him but from hundreds of miles away it is difficult.

My son has been through so much over the last year and desperately needs a male influence in his life but I am at a loss.
I have a situation where their father is not involved at all. I had my boys try Boy Scouts. I investigated and found a very good Catholic troop and it was a wonderful help until the Boy Scouts made some recent policy decisions and our Priest decided it would be better to step away. There is now a group just started this year called Scouts of St. George. You may want to look for that. Some Boy Scout troops chose to stay and function as best they could within the guidlines set. My son is close to getting his Eagle rank so he did choose to find a new troop, but the scouts if a good group can be found have been a huge help to fill that need for good men in their lives. They do boy things that I am not willing to do. It really has filled a need in our household. It also gave him a sense of purpose to focus his energy on which was lacking.
Dec 29th 2013 new
My eldest son at the age of ten was running into trouble at School,clashing with teachers who recommended a
psychologist who recommended a doctor who recommended medication for ADD.I got as far as buying the medication thinking "This is stupid!What am I doing?!". Out went the medication,in came a piano ,more sport and interaction with the boys' Uncles..hey presto a balanced happy boy whom I realized was suffering from being A Dad Deficient ,unhappy child.When he plays the piano I know all is well.
Jan 18th 2014 new
I am a single mom of a 6 year-old boy and a 19 month-old boy. I will agree that I cannot be both a mother and a father to them. I just do my best and pray a lot. My ex-husband will take them for a couple hours a week, but it is random. This is at least something, but he really does not involve himself in their lives all that much. I make sure they spend a lot of time with both sets of grandparents. Also, the 6 year old plays soccer and T-ball.

I think it's good to remember that our Lord was not raised in a traditional family. Joseph was his stepfather. We all must do our best in the situation we are in.
Jan 23rd 2014 new
Uncles and grandfathers are excellent resourses. There is still that old organization out there: Boy Scouts.
Jan 23rd 2014 new
Isabel, you understand all too well the
Chinese proverb;
a child without a father is like a home without a roof
Or another; a boy without a father figure is like an explorer without a map
Jan 24th 2014 new
(quote) Karen-712407 said:
 ... a boy without a father figure is like an explorer without a map
so true ^^^^^
Jan 24th 2014 new
(quote) Becky-1017164 said: I would love to hear more about moms have managed it. I have a 14 year old son. He is my oldest in a household full of girls (only sisters) and his father is not at all involved in his life. :( I am struggling mightily to be both a mother and a father. We don't have any close friends in our new city and although my father tries to fill in as much as possible it's hard because he is older. We do have close friends who keep in contact and try to keep up with my son and guide him but from hundreds of miles away it is difficult.

My son has been through so much over the last year and desperately needs a male influence in his life but I am at a loss.

Becky,

Talk with your pastor. Ask him if there is a Knights of Columbus chapter in the parish. One of the best things for you would be to befriend a married couple who have a son or two about your son's age. The married man can have your son just hang out with his kid(s) and see a good husband and father in action at reasonable intervals.

Just an idea.

Jan 24th 2014 new
(quote) John-559440 said: Uncles and grandfathers are excellent resourses. There is still that old organization out there: Boy Scouts.
yup.........but my suicidal son has always been an isolater................praise God for ice hockey!!!!!

laughing frozen momma on the bench wave
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