Remember: Our belief in Sacramental Reconciliation is not consistent with a "Single Chance".
For those times when it isn't in the Good Lord's plan for a second chance, I was reminded of Rilke's words recently when reading '10 poems to say goodbye' by roger housden; (excellent book)
"Every happiness is the child of a separation it did not think it could survive"
conversely, "every sorrow is the parent of a joy"
I knew she was very much in love w/ me.
Experience, and learning.
Where is your 5-years younger ex-GF now?
I had a "one that got away". Saw him several years ago, and saw characteristics in him that made me realize my early desire for him was built on fantasy, as the reality was not pleasant. If I chose to, it'd be possible to play the what-if game (if he had been with me all these years, he'd be a better man, etc), but I don't think that game is healthy. What God wants us to do is realize our sinful ways, ask for forgiveness, turn away from those sins, LEAVE THE PAST IN THE PAST, and keep working at our holiness, being new creatures in Christ, working at being His Light in the world, and spreading His Love.
If we keep thinking about the one that got away, we miss noticing the one that's here today.
I prefer to remember the quotation at Jonestown, 1978 ... "Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it." In other words, don't let another excellent one get away.
Maybe it was best we didn't windup w/ our Cleveland GFs. She and I tried to resolve the situation, but I think that both of us, in our 20s, didn't realize how good we might have been for each other.
I don't know how she is now, and am very unlikely to ever learn that.
I think if you've had any sort of correspondence with someone and then you decide to end it, you owe them an explanation. So, "no" I don't think it's too much to ask. It's the right thing to do and it provides both parties a sense of closure. You're a spring chicken though, so no worries. You have all the time in the world to find her:)