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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Jan 20th 2014 new
I would never settle as they call it. If I'm not happy in a relationship, feel that we share important values and the other per is commited there's no point in continuing to get to know someone you're feeling compatible with. If you're willing to use someone to just to keep from being alone I think that's wrong and does the other person an injustice. Being alone is not the greatest but it's much better then settling or staying with someone you don't really like because you don't want to be alone.
Jan 20th 2014 new
.. a pulse? wink
Jan 20th 2014 new
I don't know if settling is the word I would use. Rather, if someone has so many wonderful qualities and there may be something that you are not overly thrilled with you weigh the good with the bad. No one is perfect (o.k. I am wink laughing ) So we have to take what is the best and compare it to what is the worst and can you let it go or will it be annoying, so that as years go by it won't become an issue.
Jan 20th 2014 new
(quote) Kathy-635104 said:

If settling means marrying someone despite their faults, well, I've done it once and I'll do it again. I'm not interested in perfection, just the one that lights up my life and feels the same about me.

Hear, hear Kathy!!!
Jan 21st 2014 new
(quote) Juan-1022000 said: Sorry, I accidentally hit the [upload] button with nothing other than the thread title. It hasn't been my best day ever today, seriously...

I'm pretty sure you all get the point though. Please feel free to open up, ladies and gents.

And I also want to clarify that I'm not implying that we should quickly settle for "the minimum," since we all should strive for greatness the way it's understood in our faith. But the truth is we usually can't have it all and will have to settle for "someone" that meet at least certain minimum criteria in order to be seriously considered a potential spouse.
I would have to say that I would look for someone who at least had a heart for God and a desire to know Him better, a seeker.
Jan 21st 2014 new
(quote) Juan-1022000 said: Sorry, I accidentally hit the [upload] button with nothing other than the thread title. It hasn't been my best day ever today, seriously...

I'm pretty sure you all get the point though. Please feel free to open up, ladies and gents.

And I also want to clarify that I'm not implying that we should quickly settle for "the minimum," since we all should strive for greatness the way it's understood in our faith. But the truth is we usually can't have it all and will have to settle for "someone" that meet at least certain minimum criteria in order to be seriously considered a potential spouse.

HI Juan,

Hope today is a better day for you!

After reading some of the responses, ands your attempt to explain what you are asking, I am of an impression that you would really like discussed what would motivate us to want to get out on a date (a face-to-face) like some of the essentials that would need to be there for us.

What is it that would prompt us to say "yes" and not "next"?

How is it that we may have some interest initially than loose interest?

And what would it take for us, from time of introduction (via CM) to look forward to that first face-to-face meeting?

Well, something along those lines, anyway... Am I reading that right. Juan?

BTW, great name :) May the good Lord make your day a blessed one!

Jan 21st 2014 new
(quote) Mark-642218 said: .. a pulse?
heart biggrin heartbeat note
Jan 21st 2014 new

John wrote:

What is it that would prompt us to say "yes" and not "next"?

How is it that we may have some interest initially than lose interest?

And what would it take for us, from time of introduction (via CM) to look forward to that first face-to-face meeting?

Great "unpacking" here, John, imho! So,I took the "liberty" of answering what you have teased out of the OP topic

My answers:
For a Yes= The gentleman shows evidence of having read my profile="basics" are understood=something there sparked and generated genuine interest in getting to know me better.

Why Lose interest= I D K because-as a rule,I do not initiate contact...or as they say...I do not "cold call"...I do initiate communications based on forum discussion..so I maintain conversations...open inbox :-) open outbox!

To go from Intro to F2F=A sense that this gentleman, again, knows me from my profile...so the F2F is not a mutual "interview".
I would prefer going to phone early if conversation via message seems mutually interesting/fun...and then a few phone calls of length that reveal we "hit it off' and he and I have shared good laughter and a story or two together...

As a widow in an LDR* I would want to be a bit "vested" in the F2F, and I would want to be sure that the gentleman was "vested" in meeting also...(I like you from what we have shared...you seem to like me from what we have shared...let's do lunch and a walk in the park kind of thinking)... (Dating for me needs be LDR-that's a "given")

HTH your discussion here, and again, thanks, John AND Juan!
Barbara


Jan 24th 2014 new
(quote) Mark-642218 said: .. a pulse?
this is why philosophers distinguish between necessary conditions and sufficient conditions
Jan 24th 2014 new
if i have to compete between cute and lovable furry pet, and my frying pan face ... how about between quiet time and my chaotic schedule ... compete between his scrumptous dinners and going to restaurants .... compete between sports and movies .... would love to find common grounds somewhere between least and settle scratchchin crossfingers smile
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