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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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Mar 5th 2014 new

Sure ... why not! heart It would be pretty cool cool to have matched up two people! Give it a go! heart


Mar 5th 2014 new
Maybe I am the one negative response here, but I would think you would need her permission first before you go and do this. It's up to her if she is ready to do something like this first. But, that's just me looking out for others in that way.
Mar 5th 2014 new
Yes sure go for it! Praying rose heart
Mar 5th 2014 new
How would they communicate? Are you going to ask him for an email address to pass on to your friend? Are you going to give to him her contact information? But you haven't even met him. Remember online dating safety tips.
Mar 6th 2014 new
(quote) Tony-705734 said: Maybe I am the one negative response here, but I would think you would need her permission first before you go and do this. It's up to her if she is ready to do something like this first. But, that's just me looking out for others in that way.
I would never give any information either way. It was a spontaneous question I asked. You know when you meet someone and think of someone pops into your head that may be a good fit? That happened when I read a profile. You are right that it is up to a person to peruse profiles. I kind of forgot that you can fill out a profile and just send emoticons if there is any interest. Anyway, it was an off-the-cuff question.
Mar 6th 2014 new
(quote) Susan-1048377 said: How would they communicate? Are you going to ask him for an email address to pass on to your friend? Are you going to give to him her contact information? But you haven't even met him. Remember online dating safety tips.
You are right, I had not thought any further ahead about how anything would play itself out. I just read a profile and a person popped into my head that would be a good fit. It was pretty spontaneous. Anyway, I wouldn't give any information either way. If my friend were to be open to it, I would encourage her to fill out a profile on CM and just send emoticons for the time being. She has no interest in finding anyone right now.
Mar 6th 2014 new
(quote) Roystan-340472 said: What does your duty of charity towards

CM (which relies on member subscriptions to provide its service)

your friend (who cannot afford, for the time being, a CM subscription but for whom this man might be, in your opinion, the grace and gift of the perfect man)

the man whose profile you read (for whom your friend might be the 'bestest' woman he might ever meet)

those women of CM who may soon never benefit from knowing, or knowing about, this man who might have been the 'bestest' man they might ever have met ( because of the competitor whom you plan to introduce into this here datin' universe or sump'n likit)

say?
Very valid points you have made. I have to say I do agree. I have never fixed anyone up before, outside CM or otherwise. I posted that question without thinking it through. My friend has no interest in finding someone right now. It's great to get the feedback. There are things I had not considered.
Mar 6th 2014 new
Maybe if you described the profile to your friend she would be motivated to look into it!
Mar 6th 2014 new
(quote) Ellen-813688 said: Ok, people, is it acceptable to recommend a friend who is not currently on CM, to someone on CM? I just read someone's profile and I think I have a friend that would be compatible with him. What do you think?
matchmaker.... matchmaker....
Mar 6th 2014 new
(quote) Ellen-813688 said: Very valid points you have made. I have to say I do agree. I have never fixed anyone up before, outside CM or otherwise. I posted that question without thinking it through. My friend has no interest in finding someone right now. It's great to get the feedback. There are things I had not considered.

While you may have good intentions, it is always wise for a matchmaker to make an introduction, then let it go. Sometimes matchmakers get a little too attached to the ideas in their own head and start alienating others. It's just a word of caution.

In my case, matchmakers have had no clue whatsoever at all. My own experiences have been absolutely horrible and extremely unpleasant in this regard. Clueless matchmakers have tried to match me with someone they thought was good-looking (which in their minds is pretty much the only factor to consider), but this guy smoked (I'm allergic to cigarette smoke), was a good decade and a half younger than me, and our personalities were very different. The clueless matchmakers were actually offended when I was not interested, and I was upset that they would disrespect my wishes in trying to push this idea of theirs on me. It was an affront to my sense of autonomy as an adult. I choose my own friends, and I have very good reasons for choosing my own friends. It also has to do with respecting the choices and privacy of others.

The matchee should not have to justify to others why they are not interested, as it sets up a confrontational dynamic with the matchmaker who assumes that they know what they are talking about when perhaps they don't. So, the matchmaker really should not get too attached to the idea that two people are "perfect" for each other.

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