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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Jul 9th 2014 new
(quote) Paul-1049651 said: "Not interested" is pretty brutal. Maybe we should imitate the example of the famous face-saving Chinese rejection slip. You press a button and a message is sent saying "We received your emoticon with rapturous joy. Unfortunately, we are altogether unworthy of your attention and after a date with you, would be unable either to face you again with all our inadequacies, or enjoy the company of anyone else. So, with immense regret, we must decline....."
Paul, I must hand it to you, You are the ultimate wordsmith. biggrin
Jul 9th 2014 new
I agree with your first sentence Jeffrey. We are all adults (I hope!) Let's face it, rejection is a part of playing the dating game. If someone is not interested, I'd rather they let me know than try to be nice and ignore my communication. It's okay, I wear my big boy pants when I come on to CM laughing

I know non-paying members can't respond, but they can look at your profile and it will show up in "Views". It's up to us paying members then to be the responders: 'yea' or 'nay'. I think it just may get a lot of people frustrated that they don't get a response for whatever reason. I learned after about a year on here, that's pretty much the norm and if you expect differently you will be disappointed. I know that sounds negative but its the truth. It's like buying a lotto ticket. Do you really expect to win every time you play? Probably not. You know it is a long shot, but you play anyway. That's my two cents. (I'll put in more when I win the lottery!) tongue
Jul 9th 2014 new
(quote) Paul-1049651 said: "Not interested" is pretty brutal. Maybe we should imitate the example of the famous face-saving Chinese rejection slip. You press a button and a message is sent saying "We received your emoticon with rapturous joy. Unfortunately, we are altogether unworthy of your attention and after a date with you, would be unable either to face you again with all our inadequacies, or enjoy the company of anyone else. So, with immense regret, we must decline....."
This is great. I even felt a certain amount of rapturous joy reading it. :)
Jul 9th 2014 new
It goes both ways. Some people talk the talk but don't walk the walk.
Jul 9th 2014 new
When you're out dancing, do you dance with everyone who asks? Nope. So silence means not interested...or not interested at this time.
Jul 9th 2014 new
(quote) Paul-1049651 said: "Not interested" is pretty brutal. Maybe we should imitate the example of the famous face-saving Chinese rejection slip. You press a button and a message is sent saying "We received your emoticon with rapturous joy. Unfortunately, we are altogether unworthy of your attention and after a date with you, would be unable either to face you again with all our inadequacies, or enjoy the company of anyone else. So, with immense regret, we must decline....."
Ah... the ol' Misfortune Cookie. laughing
Jul 9th 2014 new
(quote) Michael-76823 said: Well, if they are not a paying member, is it realistic to expect them to pay for a subscription just to tell someone they aren't interested? And as far as increasing the odds that someone will continue sending them messages - plural - by not responding with a "not interested", I'd think that it would more likely have the opposite effect, that by the second unresponded-to message most people will get the point that the other party just isn't interested.

Yes, it is disappointing when somebody who appears to be a person we'd like to get to know completely ignores our messages. But then we have to remind ourselves to not get too invested too soon, before they've responded (or not). It's all part of the online search process. As hard as it is sometimes, we just have to move on when somebody doesn't respond the way we'd like them to. Personally I find it counterproductive to over analyze the reasons why they chose not to respond, or make the judgment that they are being rude, as we really don't know them, or what may be going on in their life at this very moment.
Brilliantly said.
Though I like the hyperbole in the 'I'm not worthy..." response too.
Perhaps I'm in the minority here, but I seem to get a pretty high rate of reply to my messages. There are a lot of gentlemen who reply with some polite version of, "Gee it's a shame we live so far apart..." or "Good luck in your search."

Jul 9th 2014 new
(quote) Kayla-549130 said: When you're out dancing, do you dance with everyone who asks?

I would.


Jul 9th 2014 new

The old Not Interested was devastating.

What could be so awful about a person that you could know right away they are not worth getting to know?


Jul 9th 2014 new
(quote) Michael-76823 said: Well, if they are not a paying member, is it realistic to expect them to pay for a subscription just to tell someone they aren't interested? And as far as increasing the odds that someone will continue sending them messages - plural - by not responding with a "not interested", I'd think that it would more likely have the opposite effect, that by the second unresponded-to message most people will get the point that the other party just isn't interested.

Yes, it is disappointing when somebody who appears to be a person we'd like to get to know completely ignores our messages. But then we have to remind ourselves to not get too invested too soon, before they've responded (or not). It's all part of the online search process. As hard as it is sometimes, we just have to move on when somebody doesn't respond the way we'd like them to. Personally I find it counterproductive to over analyze the reasons why they chose not to respond, or make the judgment that they are being rude, as we really don't know them, or what may be going on in their life at this very moment.
Yes. It is what it is.
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