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Single Living

By Diane-173836


This time of year, the question inevitably arises:  “What have you given up for Lent?”

As a child, my answer was chocolate. When I stopped eating meat, I’d joke that I would give up vegetarianism for Lent. Later, my ex-fiancé and I abstained from kissing – remembering, of course, that Sundays don’t count!

But growing older, I’ve learned the value in focusing less on what to give up and more on what I choose to embrace.

Last month I turned 40. Forty is a significant number in Scripture. The flood rained down for 40 days, the Israelites wandered in the desert for 40 years, and Jesus endured 40 days in the wilderness. Now we journey through 40 days of Lent.

At times I’ve viewed my 40 years of singleness as a cross to be endured. I sometimes focus on what I don’t have as a single woman, rather than the unique blessings of this season of life.

But the single life is not defined as a barren spiritual desert, as simply a holding ground before reaching the promised land of marriage. Rather, it can be a flourishing time of fruitfulness, connection, and community. It certainly was that for Jesus.

A desert is a place with little precipitation. Deserts can look very different – from Antarctica to the Sahara. Likewise, spiritual deserts occur in all states of life, married or single. We singles may be more attuned to our own particular burdens of loneliness or longing. But everyone experiences them.

During seasons of dryness, we can choose to respond with hope. Believing that my best days are ahead, I open myself to God working His perfect plan for my life. Whether I marry someday or remain single, Jehovah Gyra – the God who provides – is Himself more than I’ll ever need.


Reflection question: How can you embrace the fruits of your single state?



Editor’s note

Read more Lenten reflections written by CatholicMatch members:

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1 Comment

  1. Paul-663898 April 11, 2011

    I will never understand why being single is considered a bad thing. I’m glad you’ve realized it’s not.

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