I recently started thinking about what makes for true intimacy in a relationship. After a bit of contemplation, I realized that it’s a very simple, but elusive and rare thing. The person you are with should be someone with whom you can be your most “you.” Your higher self, certainly, but also your true self, your secret self that maybe only you knows. I thought of everyone in my life and realized that very few people fit that bill.
I thought about some of the things that initially attract people, as opposed to that which forges a pathway for true intimacy. If a relationship exists for other reasons, like financial security, it may lead to temporary happiness, but not true intimacy; obviously.
It made me think back to my article on the trend of dating based on credit scores and why I find that method of dating so unappealing.
It’s definitely the reason I stopped watching The Bachelor. I just can’t see how competition and mass exposure can lead to true relationship building. But of course, any kind of trend-related dating scheme is suspect to begin with—case in point, scent—based matchmaking.