It was September 2011, and as the leaves were slowly changing to burnt orange and crimson, my heart was also changing and opening myself to the possibilities of online dating and specifically, CatholicMatch.
I had always approached dating more seriously than the majority of my peers. Even while chatting in a casual happy hour setting on a first date, I could hear the quiet voice of the Holy Spirit urging me to think long-term – Is he the best person for me? Is he strong in his faith? Could this be my future husband?
So when I activated my CatholicMatch profile and opened myself to a pool of faith-filled men who also had marriage on their minds, I knew that CatholicMatch could very well change my life. And it did!
As a Catholic, you already know that choosing your future spouse is more than just picking someone you’re compatible with. It’s a faith-filled journey riddled with moments of joy as well as despair, but it’s through that journey that God reveals the very person that was created for each of us to fulfill His ultimate purpose.
The spouse you will ultimately choose will impact every facet of your life. This post on the “The Christian Pundit” explores just how crucial this choice is. While the post is written with women in mind, it most definitely applies to men, as well!
1. It will impact you spiritually.
If the guy is not a believer, you can stop right there…It will cripple your spiritual development, open up a host of temptations, stifle your prayer life, make regular church going difficult and cause massive parenting conflict if you have children.
2. It will impact you emotionally.
Is the guy you’re thinking of going to encourage you, love you, be kind to you, and seek to understand you, or will he want to go out with the guys when you’re having a hard night? Any guy who is uncaring about your feelings and self esteem is selfish and should be left alone.
3. It will impact you physically.
Is the guy you’re with going to provide for your basic needs? Will he be able to shelter, clothe and feed you? Will the man you are with care for you sexually? Is he going to honor the marriage bed in physical and mental faithfulness to you?
4. It will impact you mentally.
Is the man that you’re thinking of going to be a source of worry or will he help you deal with your worries? Is he going to encourage your intellectual development, or will he neglect it? Is he going to value your opinions and listen to what you are thinking, or will he disregard your thoughts?
5. It will impact you relationally.
How’s your relationship with your mother? Your dad? Your marriage will either strengthen or damage — even destroy — your relationship with your parents. Don’t sacrifice many good relationships for the sake of one guy who can’t value the people who love you.
These are only a few examples on how important it is to choose a loving and faithful spouse, but do you see the theme? We need to choose our spouses wisely because it matters, not only in the immediate future but for our lives 10, 20 and 30-plus years down the road.
Continue praying over your dating journey and for your future spouse. Through the ups and downs of dating, hold tight to what you know to be true — it does matter whom you marry, and your perfect, God-given match is worth the wait.