5 Ways To Cope With the Still-Single-Holiday-Blues


“The holiday season is the most difficult time of the year for single people,” said GinaMaria-622671, 29, a pediatric nurse practitioner from Houston. That’s why she was kind enough to offer CatholicMatchers five tips for coping with the still-single-holiday-blues. “I’ve had success in these five things.”

  • Reach out to a lonely elderly person. Visit an aging relative or stop by a local nursing home and hand out hard candy or prayer cards.
  • Stop by an Adoration chapel and sit with Jesus, the most intimate and healing friend. Go to Mass one extra time during the week and receive Christ in your heart.
  • Strengthen a friendship with another single friend, someone you haven’t talked to in a while. Notice how God has provided you with good friends for the single journey.
  • Talk to God in prayer. Pick a short prayer or a scripture passage you can pray every morning. (Leave suggestions in the comment box below.)
  • Visit sick children in the hospital. Most hospitals have programs to volunteer. Children remind us of the innocent excitement of Christmas; despite being seriously ill, away from their homes and friends, they still relish the pure joy of Christmas. Believe me, it is a humbling experience and it will help you cultivate a grateful heart.

Gina has one more tip for battling holiday blues: Embrace the CatholicMatch community more fully. “Put yourself out there, make comments on the blog posts and forums, don’t just read them like a fly on the wall,” she said.

“Engage, make friends, and offer advice. If one person grows or is touched in some way by your comment or insight, you have made yourself a gift, which is an act of love.”

Gina continued, “Don’t just use CatholicMatch to meet a spouse, use it to meet friends. I met a great friend a couple of months ago, another devout Catholic woman in my city, and this Advent we’re doing a Christmas novena together.

“God is always opening doors, but it’s up to you to take the action of walking through it. What you put into CatholicMatch is what you’ll get out of it.”



  1. Beverly-527244 December 20, 2010 Reply

    I am fortunate to have family and church friends nearby to share the days with, my heart goes out to those who feel “stuck” due to high airfare rates and work schedules that don’t coincide with a vacation away to see others they already know and love. These suggestions are wonderful and l will share them with those who I know feel “alone” this holiday.

  2. Lenny-573788 December 20, 2010 Reply

    I find myself feeling VERY blessed this time of year to have the supportive family, friends, and great career that I have been given. The worst part for me is wanting that “someone” to share all of these great things with.

  3. Ruth-463886 December 19, 2010 Reply

    Thanks Gina for your tips. This is the time of the years that I wish celebrate with my family but they live in other country, I don’t have a kids, my little men (my dog) died 2 years ago. I’m alone here and I miss they so much. Thanks a God for his love , Have a Merry Christmas

  4. Elisa-660353 December 17, 2010 Reply

    Thank you so much for sharing these tips. It is a great reminder of what advent and Christmas is all about, being able to share God’s LOVE with those around us and those who may be needing to have someone around. Many of us have families to spend the holidays and even though i may be single , let us not forget there may be many others who are single and absolutely without anyone at all. Let us be grateful and hope we can extend our love to others. I was just thinking where at this time i could voluteer my services.
    God created us not to be comfortable but to be comforters.”In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.”~Albert Schweitzer
    Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves.
    ~James Matthew Barrie

  5. Michael-206027 December 16, 2010 Reply

    Thanks Gina Marie, Your “5 Ways To Cope” are excellent!

  6. Jim-397948 December 13, 2010 Reply

    Five ways to be better and less lonely…1-Forgive the People who hurt you and leave them behind without carrying misery into 2011. 2-Help Prepare a meal for the Homelss. 3-Take a card from the Post Office and wrap a gift. 4-Help to decorated the church or other community event at church. 5-Call 5-10 people you have not heard from all year.

  7. Roy-653148 December 12, 2010 Reply

    It was great and reinforced what I had already contemplated but unable to follow up on.

  8. Michael-598207 December 9, 2010 Reply

    Thank you for the post. I just spent Thanksgiving alone, and will probably do the same for Christmas.

  9. Michele-642915 December 9, 2010 Reply

    I would suggest soft candy for the elderly so that they don’t have a choking hazard because some of them have dentures or tooth problems and it could get stuck in the teeth or they may have a problem chewing it or if they’re left alone without someone monitoring them at all times it could be hard to notice if they’re having trouble eating the candy

  10. Bailey-655617 December 8, 2010 Reply

    Great advice! Thanks.

  11. Carol-415533 December 8, 2010 Reply

    please cancell my subscription. I have met a nice man and I do not need this service anymore.

  12. Darren-336767 December 8, 2010 Reply

    “Not my thoughts but yours, Lord” helps the old squirrels in the cages of my mind sometimes….:)

    Thanks Gina. Merry Christmas.

  13. Paul-219641 December 8, 2010 Reply

    GinaMaria, I appreciate your advice, but the fact is that it REALLY sucks being single during the holidays. I’ve been a good and single Catholic my entire life (29 years) and have watched everyone else pair off and move on with their lives. I can’t stand the jewelry commercials that are coming on TV, the holiday carols about finding love on Christmas eve, and the cards I receive with a couple’s picture on them. I’ve asked the Lord for someone to share the holiday with ever since I can remember, but each one passes by and I’m still alone. Even the one woman I work with and that I truly want to be with will probably get engaged on Christmas Eve and that will be another prayer unanswered. I’m almost at the point of not wanting to have anything to do with the holiday season and I’m scared that at some point, God altogether.,

    • Scott-626495 December 8, 2010 Reply

      December 8, 2010 at 3:51 am
      Dear Paul, Even though no other can walk in anothers shoes but Christ, I believe I do feel your pain. Having a few years (specifically 12) and still in the never married column does hurt in particular at this time of year. Even more so, I just recently has to let go the best woman that ever came into my life. Beautiful, kind, smart, sweet & soooo much more. Unfortunately I felt the Lord telling me that she is not the one and struggled with this for over 2 years. I just learned that it looks likely that she meet “The One” just 3 weeks ago and on my recommendation to boot! As still having love for this woman and an empty spot in my heart and by my side, this was starting to be a big-heartbreak and I nearly became overwhelmed just yesterday as I learned this, the reality was here. As this sadness started to settled deep into to me I entered deep prayer to Christ & gave it to him in Trustful Surrender to his Divine Providence. This was something that I have struggled with & after randomly receiving a book with this same title (Author Father Jean Baptisite Saint-Jure S.J.) recently I prayed this & truly gave it to God & I can honestly tell you the relief is so wonderful! Do I still miss my ex & love her, of course personally I will always love all all of my “Ex-Love’s” but number one I am not in love with them and number two & much more importantly I am head over heals in love with Jesus.
      Paul my friend, hang in there and as another single unmarried catholic man, the best advice I can tell you is to specifically pray to God in offering this up to him & ask for the help for “Trustful Surrender” to his Divine Providence. As you do the focus of your unmet love here on earth for a mate WILL subside and the more you focus on him geniunely, the more he will focus on giving you what you truly need and in doing so you will achieve final title to the above mentioned book which is “…The Secret to Peace & Happiness.”
      Many blessings to you Paul & I will put you in my prayers.
      Much Love in Christ

    • Michele-642915 December 9, 2010 Reply

      it sounds like your last sentence was not the end of your sentence?
      yeah who gets their act together to give all those cool things for the 12 days of Christmas anyway
      nowadays i can’t stand watching It’s a Wonderful Life because it’s more depressing than inspiring
      ultimately, the true meaning of Christmas is Christ-mass – the baby Jesus’ birthday…
      remember that joyful feeling at Christmas as a kid without a care in the world?
      let your heart be childlike this Christmas and enjoy the real spirit of the holiday

  14. Laverne-486076 December 8, 2010 Reply

    Yes, I like this story. My husband passed away 18 months ago and this is the 2nd Christmas without him. It is a difficult time. Someone told me Don’t cry because it is over, smile because it happened. That is a great way to look at it. I am a positive person and despite my age of 71 hope to find happiness again. I pray every day that God will direct me to this person. Laverrne

  15. Joan-650538 December 8, 2010 Reply

    Thank you for sharing some fantastic advice. It is true, the holidays are difficult, especially for me.
    I lost my spouse in April (he was my best friend). Now I know that Jesus wants me to move forward with my life. I am blessed with a wonderful family but I still miss him so much, so every time I feel sorry for myself, I pray, somehow I get a message to smile & be happy for him because he is with Jesus and not suffering anymore, then I can smile & get on with life. Joan

  16. Patricia-583968 December 8, 2010 Reply

    What a lovely young lady you are. God Bless you!

  17. Ana-608593 December 7, 2010 Reply

    Thank you for great suggestions, remember that everything we do will comeback to us. Have a merry Christmas. ¡Feliz Navidad!

  18. Robert-657217 December 7, 2010 Reply

    Great advice GinaMaria and thanks for sharing your ideas! I wish everyone a very Merry Christmas!

  19. Keith-644830 December 7, 2010 Reply

    great stuff! I am new to Catholic Match. Not sure how the forums work. Seems impersonal.

  20. Anastasia-498491 December 7, 2010 Reply

    These tips are great any time of year… Happy Advent and Merry Christmas!

  21. William-623604 December 7, 2010 Reply

    great message for holiday mery christmess &happy new years god bess bill

  22. Mary-645111 December 7, 2010 Reply

    I am going through the holiday blues myself right now,I am blessed to have family and frriens and also one special girlfriend that I can talked too. Thanks for your help.
    Have A Blessed Merry Christmas Mary

  23. Joel-578394 December 7, 2010 Reply

    inject love into the world,you will receive love in return,that is the power of love.

  24. Joel-578394 December 7, 2010 Reply

    inject love into the world and you will receive love in return,that is the power of love.

  25. Tricia-476975 December 7, 2010 Reply

    Fantastic advice! I actually work at the Naval Air Station in Corpus Christi and have gotten into helping send care packages to our military. Its a way to give of yourself and your time. It makse you feel so much better and they love getting notes and packages from people at home as well.

  26. Stuart-623821 December 7, 2010 Reply

    Great post. Thanks for sharing!

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