Before 2010 Ends, Cast A Wider Net — And Start Scrolling!


It’s easy to set limits on the search for a mate – from height to age to education to politics – but before the year draws to a close, I urge you to cast a wider net.

At least once.

You may be missing someone, even The One, by restricting your member search, and you owe it to yourself to launch a broader one.

Carve out an hour one cold December night, make a cup of coffee and pour over a criteria-lifted hunt. Get rid of your biases and preferences. Search for someone a few years older. A few inches shorter. Someone who’s more health conscious or less, someone who wants more kids or fewer, someone who votes differently or prays differently. And try one search – I dare you – with no geographic restriction.

Then open your mind and start scrolling. See who pops up. Look for a profile that piques your interest, that makes you tilt your head or crack a smile.

Take your time. It’s not a speed search, just a chance to take in a bunch of new profiles.

And here’s one more tip: Bring in a fishing partner. Guys, ask a sister, a close girl friend or a female cousin who’s in town for Christmas to pull up a chair and play armchair quarterback. Ladies, chances are your best friend would be utterly honored to sit by your side and do a little color commentary.

You can go back to your usual criteria soon. I promise. But don’t let 2010 – and all its hopes and promises – come to an end before you’ve cast a wider CatholicMatch search.



  1. Paul-99681 December 8, 2010 Reply

    Hi CM I hearty agree and because due to my location making long distance the only option I have over the years have become one of it’s most avid students!

    I also all to well know of the hardships as well why many people feel the way they do but first their is nothing easy about a relationship and finding the right person is about finding the right person and if God we pray to God to send them do we really want to stipulate that only be if they are handy ?

    Probably not cause God might think that we think that we have everything al figured out ahead of him and do we really know that we can’t relocate for sure? after all how many things are really written in stone?

    I had met one women starting with one letter then soon we were writing every day and often we would talk all evening into the early morning and five months later we met and it felt to both of us that it was just a simple step because we really knew each other and really not being with the other person will sharpen other senses but all this would have never been possible without effort and even now due to circumstances beyond only God’s control it could be years before and if we ever see each other again but I would never trade that for the times we spent together .

    Long distance isn’t for the faint of heart but if you think about the many devoices perhaps the longest distances have nothing to do with mileage , and in a way it dose separate the women from the girls and the boys from the men and also as many who are around my age it would seem like we tried like it or not shopping “local” long enough and the boy or girl next door has long since moved away!

    So if you can travel do it and thank God that you can and if not write write and write some more ! and be darn glad to have all the options you do so stop thinking “your” in control and looking your gift horses in the mouth!

  2. Libia-512434 December 7, 2010 Reply

    perhaps the site should also do stronger marketing instead of pushing the captive audience to look farther away. While a long distance relationship is do able…….. long distance dating is another thing.

  3. De-315276 December 7, 2010 Reply

    And for those of us who have very few restrictions already, your advice is…..

    • Michele-642915 December 9, 2010 Reply

      we’re not looking for just “anyone” interested in a holy catholic marriage, because *everyone* on here seems to be interested in that, so obviously we have to make up our mind about what we’re looking for…things to try: being open minded about setting the dream match criteria to become more – or less – specific than it was before. And learn from the other bios we read, to think of how we can grow in the Faith. who knows maybe by seeing what others are interested in… if we try another devotion or gain another hobby or read another book – we will be one step closer to being prepared for the next conversation with someone.

  4. George-260000 December 7, 2010 Reply

    Third paragraph from the bottom — should be “speed” search.

    Thanks for the advice, but the long-distance thing doesn’t always work if one has a career and/or minor children. Happy Advent, everyone.

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