Ray-566531: ‘Now I Feel No Sense Of Urgency’


By Ray-566531

Reflecting upon the change from marriage to widowhood, I can trace the evolution of the thought process that brings me to the here and now. When I recovered from the worst of my grieving period, I was eager to find another “right one,” so I set out on this venture, which included joining CatholicMatch.

Now I feel no sense of urgency. How did this come about?

As time marched on, I became involved in more activities – some family, some social, and others that are Church or charity oriented. With increasing interest and involvement in these activities, I’ve discovered a sense of fulfillment – in a different way, of course.

Lent is an opportune time to work with the Church and charitable groups even more intensely, focusing upon some of the Beatitudes and God’s greatest commandments.

Being single I can offer more time in the service of our fellow man. It’s a way to fulfill my  present calling, and I regard serving as a privilege.

Being of service can easily be done here on CatholicMatch. Daily, we see CatholicMatch members facing challenges. How helpful we can be to reach out with a friendly, encouraging word or prayer to bring them comfort.

I regard Lent as a time of joy.


It’s a strong reminder of why our Lord put us here and the good that we can do by sacrificing for others.

Also, despite the sufferings of Jesus, miracles took place – the Eucharist was instituted, and the prophecy of the Resurrection was fulfilled. How can we not be thankful for what we have been given? How can we not show it? It’s our calling!

Reflection question: Are you a joyful Catholic?

Editor’s note

Read more Lenten reflections written by CatholicMatch members:



  1. Mark-642218 April 20, 2011 Reply

    Thank you Ray. Profound, inspiring, powerful insight and encouragement as ever!

  2. Dawn-58330 April 13, 2011 Reply

    Ray, I really liked reading your reflection. I value it on many levels. First, it was a new look into a friend. I see your words as a gift of friendship. Secondly, I am glad for the reminder that Lent is about joy, and that in the midst of our sacrifices there is great cause for joy. Lastly, I am grateful for your service to us on CatholicMatch. Many times I have read your calm words and sage advice and felt that all is right in my online world. Thank you for offering your support and encouragement to me and so many others. Please keep sharing all that you have learned!

  3. Carolaine-631526 April 13, 2011 Reply



    Your Essay has sure hit home for me!!

    As a widow…wowwww I felt I was reading my own thoughts…as I do yours in the FORA!!

    YES, I too felt an urgency when I was first widowed, a rush to hurriedly replace the bliss, the magic of having a beautiful and wonderful marriage…and experiencing so much love!

    I could not understand why when people were divorcing, why was our marriage of just four years, four months and thirteen days cut so short…Why did cancer have to touch our home!

    Goodness, on one of my weekly visits to my husband’s grave, that first year of my sorrowful loss, I recall looking at the hand of the Cemetery director, seeing if he had a wedding ring…and running from my home, nearly two years after my husband’s loss to a job to retreat from the loneliness…and when that special man I met, also passed on…I thought…God’s will be done…it is just not the time to remarry…it’s not meant for me to fall in love…at this time…

    I have no more urgency to walk down the aisle again…let the next man find me, if it should be, as my late husband and a very special friend found me…

    I turned to Jesus, the Beatitudes, our faith…and each day I find myself wanting to help the children of Jesus since I have none of my own…grow in my Catholicism and be good to all of my Lord’s Brethren…

    Thank you for this most wondrous of reflections…and thank you Catholic Match for printing Ray’s essay…

    Being a widow and “golden girl” THIS one hit home!!!

    Blessings to you, Ray…

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