Does Marriage Confusion Lead to Bad Dating?


Are Catholics dating with the purpose of marriage? Do single Catholics have an understanding of marriage as a vocation? Do dating and engaged couples put too much emphasis on the magic of the wedding day instead of preparing for a lifetime?

CEO and co-founder of the CatholicMatch Institute, Brian Barcaro, talks with Brian Patrick from the Son Rise Morning Show about the call to marriage. He points out that if you don’t understand the call to marriage, it is difficult to discern and date for that call.

Barcaro also discusses the importance of engaged couples viewing their marriage as a vocation. He encourages couples to spend their time and energy preparing for their whole marriage rather than just their wedding day. “We’re trying to get the idea of ‘vocation’ to be back at the top of the list in people’s mind because I think if we can bring back that deeper understanding of the vocation of marriage, it’s going to solve the marriage crisis. Then it’s going to start trickling down and start solving the religion vocation crisis—priests and nuns come from families.”

Brian Barcaro shared that the CatholicMatch Institute was established to better educate single Catholics on the subject of marriage. “We think if single Catholics are more educated on the marriage vocation, they will be better daters and eventually more successful in marriage,” says Barcaro.

For more ideas about how to promote marriage and help single Catholics “get to the altar,” listen to the Son Rise Moring Show interview from August 2013, (click on the player above).




  1. Cataldo-787443 May 26, 2014 Reply

    Ciao Ella! Thanks for your useful articles. You are talented in choosing topics:) God bless

  2. Alma-953915 May 23, 2014 Reply

    Amen! CM has helped me to understand marriage as a vocation and it’s also helped me to understand my faith better. It is because of this understanding, that I love my faith even more, today, than ever before.

  3. Robert-3483 May 23, 2014 Reply

    You should be meeting people with your whole lifetime in mind, including eternity.

    “It is a blessed thing to love on earth as we hope to love in Heaven, and to begin that friendship here which is to endure for ever there. Jesus Christ loved John, Lazarus, Martha, and Magdalene with specially tender friendships, as we are told in Holy Scripture. We know that St Paul dearly loved St Mark, St Petronilla, Bishop Stachys (Romans 16:9), Timothy, Thecla, St Claudia and Pope Linus (2 Tim 4:21). St Ambrose loved St Monica because of her many virtues, and that she in return loved him as an Angel of God.”

    “Saint Paul reproaching the derangement of the Gentiles, accuses them of being people without affection, that is to say who had no friendship (Romans 1:31).” Make yourself affable to the congregation of the poor, humble your soul to the elderly, and bow your head to a great man (Ecclus 4:7). St. Thomas the Universal Doctor, states that friendship is part of the virtue of justice. (The Summa Theologica of St. Thomas Aquinas – Question 114. The friendliness which is called affability)

    It is important to avoid the extreme of avoiding people not in your interest or discernment towards the vocation of marriage. “Either to seek or to shun society is a fault in one striving to lead a devout life in the world. To shun society implies indifference and contempt for one’s neighbors; and to seek it savors of idleness and uselessness. We are told to love one’s neighbor as one’s self. In token that we love him, we must not avoid being with him, and the test of loving one’s self is to be happy when alone.”

    Sin, including acts of silent omission, damages or destroys fraternal communion (CCC 1469). Of the difference between true and false friendship:
    * Worldly friendship ordinarily produces a grand cluster of honeyed words, a cajolery of small passionate endearments from beauty, grace, and sensual qualities.
    * Sacred friendship has a simple and frank language, praising the virtue and grace of God, the unique foundation on which it subsists.

    The highest grace does not lie in only meeting people for a single purpose, but in having no friendships which are not good, holy, and true. “Marriage, when rightly understood, is a very real and holy friendship.” So it should fit among them. See: “Foolproof Advice for Improving Your Love Life (with pictures)” by Emily Stimpson —

    Most quotes from “Introduction to the Devout Life” by Gentleman Saint and Church Doctor Francis de Sales, approved by multiple popes to improve the sanctity of the children of God.

  4. Carol-1017436 May 23, 2014 Reply

    Couldn’t find the interview on the link?

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