When it became clear to Mary and Todd that they weren’t going to find a Catholic spouse in their local communities, they each turned to online dating. Surprisingly, they found each other online even though they both lived in Charlotte, N.C.
Todd, 32, says, “Every time my friends set me up with someone, they never seemed to understand what I was looking for. I figured if I were going to meet someone Catholic and perhaps get married one day, it would have to be through the Internet. I had an old college friend who 
had met his spouse on CatholicMatch and I thought I would give it a shot."
Mary, 34, attended several young adult groups at local Catholic Churches, but had also failed to find anyone she was interested in. Mary says, “I was a little reluctant about the whole online dating thing, but I had known people that have had success with it, so when my sister told me about CatholicMatch, I thought it sounded perfect."
Todd had been on CatholicMatch on and off since 2008. He connected with Mary in November 2013 when he sent her a wink. “My confidence was low, thinking she probably wouldn't reply back. To my surprise, she sent me a message! But I couldn't read it because I wasn't a paying member and didn't have the money to subscribe at the time. I felt horrible.”
Mary was disappointed that she didn’t hear back from Todd, so she started communicating with another member.
“Months went by and there was a Valentine's Day sale and I was able to subscribe," Todd says. "She was the first person I checked out. She had written a few paragraphs, commenting about my fan-hood of the Muppets and about her Thanksgiving. She asked me how mine was. Since it was now February, I thought it would be funny to still comment on how my Thanksgiving was. I wrote some other stuff, including an apology for sending a wink I couldn't back up, but was afraid she wouldn't write back. But she did! The first of a million surprises she has brought me.”
The couple emailed back and forth for a few weeks before Todd asked Mary out for coffee—assuring her that it was a low-pressure date. On March 2, 2014, the couple met at a Starbucks in uptown Charlotte, N.C.
“I was excited but nervous about our date. I was talking to a friend on the phone on the way there and apparently speeding. I got pulled over! I wasn’t as upset as I normally would have been about getting a speeding ticket. I actually thought it would make a funny story,” says Mary.
She called Todd, worried that she would be late, but she actually made it there before him. “When he walked up, he was even cuter in person. We were laughing about the crazy first date situation and in the line, he said to me “I’ll pay for your coffee. You’ll probably need to save your money for the court costs.”
Todd also thought Mary was cute, and he was attracted to her smile, eyes, and beautiful hair. “We started talking and I was instantly hooked. We had a lot of similar interests, had watched a lot of the same TV shows, and had a similar sense of humor. Once we got going, it was the easiest date I had ever been on. There was never a lull.”
Mary was also pleased with their first meeting. “It was the best first date I had. After that one date, I canceled another date with someone else. I couldn’t imagine possibly liking the other guy better.”
In May, Todd let Mary know he was serious. “I definitely knew she was the one before she knew I was the one—well, before she would say it anyway. So I told her, 'Look, you
know how I feel. So let's have a great summer and we'll talk about marriage at the end of it. I won't bring it up unless you do.'"
Mary agreed to his proposition and then in July, she brought up the topic of marriage. “I had casually mentioned that I would be really embarrassed if he proposed to me in front of a lot of people.”
This was all the encouragement that Todd needed. He spoke to her father, purchased the ring, and “let it burn a hole in [his] pocket for a little while.”
When Todd did propose, it was simple—just as Mary had requested.
“One night, we were [at my house] just talking on the couch and we said something that really segued into a proposal moment.” Todd quickly got up and went to get the ring.
Mary says, “I assumed he was going to the bathroom, but when he came back out he asked me to stand up, and he knelt down. I knew the engagement was coming up, but he totally took me by surprise that day. It was really sweet. He told me all about how much he loved me and wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. Then he held out the ring, but didn’t ask the question.”
Todd recalls, “She stood there, excited, but silent. 'Are you gonna ask the question?' she asked. 'Oh,' I thought. 'I'm a moron.' So I asked her to marry me, and she said yes!”
“It was perfect,” says Mary.
The couple will be joined in holy matrimony on April 11, 2015 at St. Mark Catholic Church in Huntersville, N.C.
